Our Search for Fabulous

cough + slime = Mulan.

2012-01-26T10:42:00.000-08:00

We're having a sick day.

Carly started coughing a few days ago and I was really hoping it would go away.

I don't do sick.

When the flu shot came out, we were first in line.

Like, literally, we were the first ones in the line.

And I have had Carly on a strict walk-through-the-door-go-straight-to-wash-hands policy.

We've made it this far.

Not too shabby.

But it caught us.

The coughing came, now she is all slimy and sneezy and loopy.

So she gets to lay on the couch with her besties and watch Mulan.

And I'm doing a bit of crafting in between nose wiping and juice refilling.

Movies and crafts and snacks all day isn't that bad.

But I'm hoping its a one-dayer.

xoxo.

a major award.

2012-01-24T11:52:00.000-08:00

A while ago, my friend Brianna nominated me for the "Kreativ Blogger" award. Isn't that nice? We all like getting a shout-out once in a while. So I thought I'd keep the love alive. The rules?

1. Post 10 things about yourself others may not know.
2. Post the award.
3. Nominate 6 others for the award.

Ok, ready?

Ten things you may not know about me:

1. I secretly want purple streaks in my hair. I hated having red hair as a kid. It makes you different, and when you're a kid, you don't want to be different. But now I love my red hair, and would never color it, because I feel like I would never get my original color back. But, sometimes you do want to change things up, and often women do that by changing their hair. So I really want purple streaks. And a friend who does hair told me I could do purple extensions, so I wouldn't have to color my real hair. Even better. Finally, I told Chris about this desire, and he told me about a girl his freshman year with red hair and purple streaks and he just thought she was the bomb.com back in the day. Well, if that doesn't seal the deal, I don't know what will! Oh, someday soon I'm going to have purple streaks, trust me. I want to do it now, but then I'll have purple streaks in all the pictures from having the twins and when they are teenagers they will ask "Mom, why do you have purple in your hair?" Ha! Maybe it would be a good summer change, after I get my legs back under me. Good plan.

2. I have a thing for Russian/Eastern European names. Like Dmetri, Alexei, Natalia, Anastasia, Tatiana. I would totally name a girl Anastasia if it wasn't a little bit much. And one name I love for Miss A has that Eastern European flair to it, which makes me love it but also makes it a little hard to settle on since we have a hard-core Irish last name. And when I was a little girl I had a huge crush on a Russian gymnast named Alexei. Just thought I'd throw that in there.

3. For several years now, Chris and I have slept under separate blankets. We discovered early in our marriage that I'm a blanket hog, and that I like to sleep under two heavy blankets and Chris likes to sleep under one light blanket. And thus, the separation. It works well, and snuggling is still totally possible, don't worry.

4. Despite having a Bachelor's degree, I have no idea what kind of career I'd ever want to do, or what kind of advanced degree I'd want to get. For a long time I wanted to be a college professor, but now that I see what is involved in getting a PhD, I'm not that excited about the prospect. I loved my sociology undergrad, but don't see myself getting a Masters in it, as it is a lot of theory and very little actual doing. I'm really clueless. I would like to do something when all my kids are in school. I just don't know what. If I could go back in time, I would do my undergrad in dietetics and do something with Celiac Disease. Well, that is a nice idea theoretically, but I hate science and chemistry, so I'm not sure that would have actually worked out. My dream job? The blogger for the Pittsburgh Penguins official website. Yes, that would be awesome.

5. In high school, I used two new towels every day. I'm not kidding. That is 14 towels a week. I used one for my hair and one to dry my body. I can't believe my mom put up with that. Granted, I mostly did my own towel laundering at that point, but still. That habit was quickly knocked out of me when I went to college and had to pay for laundry.

6. If I could look exactly like Miranda Kerr, I would. (Do NOT Google Miranda Kerr, as she is a Victoria's Secret model. Use the reference below.)

7. My all time favorite movies: Jurassic Park, Sabrina, and the American President. Whenever Jurassic Park is on tv, Chris and I watch it and probably say "This is such a great movie" 20 times throughout. Sabrina is pure class and romance, and American President is politics, humor, and romance all in one. And they all have that fabulous 90s flair. Oh, the 90s. Those were the glory days.

8. I had a huge crush on Tom Brokaw as a tween. For reals. I would watch NBC Nightly News pretty much every night because we didn't have cable and I was a nerd. And I really loved when he wore the blue dress shirt with the white color and a red tie. Classy.

9. I love having painted fingernails. It makes me feel pulled together and pretty. The problem is, somehow my lifestyle (picking up toys and doing dishes, perhaps?) leads to them chipping easily. And being pregnant makes them grow out fast. So they never last long, but I do love painting them, and wish I could keep them perfectly painted all the time.

10. I L-O-V-E eggs. I love them in all forms, but really love them with runny yolks, which you're not supposed to eat when you're pregnant so it is on my list come March. I love eggs on bagels, and hardboiled with butter and salt, and in quesadillas . . . ooo, people, make an egg and salsa quesadilla. There was a phase around 18 weeks when that was just about all I could eat. Yum.

There you go.

Now, for my 6 blogs? I'll just share 6 I enjoy reading:

1. Stacey. We went to high school together. She has two cute boys and Chris and I always say if we lived next to them, we hope they would want to hang out with us, because we think they're cool.

2. The Apron Gal. This is not a plug. She's my sister-in-law. She is an awesome party-thrower and a fabulous cook and shares lots of great ideas and recipes. I love how she goes all-out in everything she does.

3. Nichelle. She is a Michigan friend. She has a seriously cute, laid-back little boy, and writes very clever posts.

4. Dore. She is my aunt. She has the spunkiest girl Novalie, and is just about the funnest mom I've ever seen. She is herself, and is a great example to me.

5. Taryn. We also went to high school together. She is mom to two beautiful girls and doing the student wife thing like me. Her posts are insightful and inspiring. And she's an extremely talented writer.

6. Rachel. I don't technically know Rachel in real life, I'm just a blog-stalking e-friend. She is unique and creative and funny. I always love her posts.

Yay for shout-outs.
xoxo.

the party tent.

2012-01-18T16:35:00.000-08:00

We are settling in nicely to this new new semester.

Chris's schedule looks to be a bit friendlier than last semester, and his workload so be a tad lighter.

A huge blessing, considering what he'll have going on at home.

Carly and I are working on filling the days with fun while I simultaneously try to check off everything on my mile-long to-do list. We were in potty training lock down for over a week. It was hard, possibly one of the hardest weeks I've had as a mother to date. Thank you for a) ensuring me that Carly's behavior was normal, and b) convincing me not to stop. She is now doing great, and today is day 2 of zero accidents. I put a pull-up on her when we go in public because I physically can't deal with cleaning her up in a situation like that, but so far every time she has kept them dry. And she has gone potty at church and Red Robin. The girl is a champ. We are plugging along, though I see it being several weeks of routinely going before I'll feel like she is officially "potty trained".

During that time I tried to keep things somewhat positive.

One day I suggested we paint our toes.

Carly interpreted that as her painting her own toes.

I figured why not?

She had excellent form, though she needs to work on her aim.

We also played extensively with her new collection of toys from Christmas, painted lots of pictures, and probably watched Mulan 8 times. We introduced it to her recently and she officially loves it.

[two little princesses.]

We kicked off our three-day MLK Day weekend with a trip to Babies R Us. Carly and I desperately needed out of the house. We told Carly we were going to the 'baby store', and when we walked in she asked "Where are all the babies?" Smart girl. My main goal was a diaper bag, and I found one I'd been looking at online that is designed for twins. Its pretty big, not going to lie. I got it and figured I would do a "test pack" to see if I really needed that much space, factoring in two babies and the few toddler things I still carry. I tested it today, and, for sure, I'll need the space. So if you're looking for me in April, I'll be the girl with the toddler carrying a towel, two infant carseats, and a massive diaper bag. (To be fair, it doesn't look that big when it is on me.)

While I was looking inside every diaper bag in the entire store, Chris and Carly headed toward the stuffed animals. Remember when we got Carly Leo the Lion for her first Christmas? Well, it looks like that same company now makes a whole line of toys in Leo form, including a little Leo. Carly brought him to me and said, "Look! Baby Leo!" I think I scared her I squealed so loud. It was pretty much the cutest thing ever, and Chris and I knew he was coming home. They also make a Leo chair, and Leo baby toys. I had no choice, I got Boy B a little Leo baby toy and Miss A a similar elephant. They each need one toy that isn't a hand-me-down from Carly, right? Oh, man, it was too much cuteness. That, and I'm really really emotional and sentimental these days. Let's not talk about how often I cry listening to country music.

[mommy Leo, baby Leo, and red shoes. what else could a girl need?]

Then on Monday, we headed to Ikea for my Christmas present shopping adventure.

All I felt like buying was storage bins and baby/kid stuff. Surprise, surprise, right?

But I did get myself a really cute and really comfy black and white striped blanket.

A person should probably not like a blanket this much.

Especially someone who is still in their twenties.

But it was a lovely purchase.

We also came home with an array of frames and bins and . . .

heaven help us . . .

a circus tent.

To say this girl is spoiled is an understatement, but we could not leave without that tent. Not because she was begging for it, but because we both wanted to get it for her so bad. And Ikea doesn't help the cause by selling things so dang cheap. The tent is a huge hit, and Carly started calling it the "party tent". I have no idea where she got that from, but it sure is outrageously cute.

But a word to the wise: before buying a party tent, ask yourself how much time you are willing to spend in said tent, and how many times a day you want to crawl in and out of the tent at 30 weeks pregnant with twins. Just a tip. We spend a LOT of time in the party tent.

One night, Chris was trying to avoid going in the tent because it is rather stuffy, and isn't exactly build for full-grown adults. Carly interpreted his hesitancy as fear. She went to him and wrapped her arms around him and said "Its ok, daddy. There's nothing bad. There are no bats and no ghosts." It was was just about the sweetest thing ever. And, of course, he ended up in the tent, where he remained a prisoner until bath time.

[managing to watch tv without having to leave her tent.]

Last but not least, we've discovered Play Dough. I have mixed feelings about this, but Carly loves it. She is unsure exactly how to proceed with it, though, and it turns into mostly me playing with it under her direction. She does smell it and says, "Mmmm. That smells good. Can I eat it?" I keep a pretty close eye on her to make sure she doesn't sneak any.

So, things are good in the C house.

I've got all sorts of projects going on.

I'm making baby blankets and burp cloths, finishing a bathroom we painted this summer before I got sick, cleaning out and reorganizing closets, and working to get our basement to an organized place where we might actually be able to use it as a playroom/guest area. Maybe. We'll see how it goes.

And I hit 30 weeks. Something about that sent Chris and I into a bit of a tizzy on Sunday. I wrote out a to-do list and a still-need list and we're working on crossing things off. The goal is to be ready by 34 weeks, because we have no idea how things will play out, and I don't want to be working all crazy at the end.

Life is lovely, don't you think?

xoxo.

last-ditch effort.

2012-01-11T17:50:00.000-08:00

Hey peeps. I'm going to tell you a story, and you're going to share your wisdom if you have some. Then I'll delete this post, so all this potty talk doesn't remain in our family record forever. Ready?

Carly is starting to get the hang of the potty. She goes #1 pretty good, and the last few days have only had 1 or 2 accidents. We've made really good progress twice, and each time we've run into the same hurdle: poop. Carly won't poop in her little toilet. We can't tell exactly why, but she won't. She will hold it and hold it until you can see how uncomfortable she is and it gets unhealthy. The first time, we just encouraged her to get it out, and she went in her panties. This time around, she wouldn't go, so we put a diaper on her and Chris got her to run around until she really didn't have a choice but to let it out.

Here's the thing: she has learned that she should go to the bathroom in her potty. She likes the feeling of being successful at that and she is proud of herself and her big girl underwear. But she doesn't want to go #2 in the toilet. So instead she just doesn't go anywhere. And when she spends so much time holding in the poo, she stops thinking about the pee, and it leads to accidents. A lot of accidents. So it is a cycle. We'll make really good pee progress for a few days, she'll start to have to go #2, and then start holding it in, and the accidents start. And we have a day like today where all we had was accidents and frustration.

I'm afraid she is emotionally exhausted from all of this. I'm afraid she is only having negative experiences. And I'm afraid she'll close off totally to the idea. For the first time, I'm considering throwing in the towel and trying again this summer. For the first time, I'm wondering if she really was ready, or if I forced the idea. I don't know, its just we've gotten this far, I'd hate to back out now, but I also don't want this to get any worse, because I'm a grump, she's started acting out a bit, and poor Chris just tries to calm me down when I send him ticked off text messages about cleaning up pee.

If you have any advice, do share.
Thanks.
xoxo.

he thinks my waddle's sexy.

2012-01-10T19:48:00.000-08:00

Last week, Chris and I were watching a movie. I paused it for a second to get something from the kitchen, and walked past him. I heard him chuckle. "Are you laughing at my waddling?" I asked. He replied, "You are so beautiful, and you are looking very pregnant." Luckily, I have a husband who thinks I'm extra beautiful when pregnant (either that, or he's a great liar). I proceeded to sing a fabulous version of "He thinks my waddle's sexy" to the tune of "She thinks my tractor's sexy", then continued on to the kitchen to get more to eat.

We're large and in charge around these parts.

And only getting larger.

[28 weeks comparison between Carly pregnancy and me last week; same shirt]

Off I went to the doctor this morning for yet another look at the kids. Miss A is a whopping 3 lbs 3oz (71st percentile for a singleton) and Boy B is 2 lbs 15 oz (49th percentile for a singleton). So I'm rocking over 6 lbs of baby right now and measuring 36 cm, at 29 weeks. I've also got sciatic nerve pain and round ligament pain working hand-in-hand to cause me to cry out in pain randomly and limp around like I have a peg leg. I've got one round ligament on the right side that causes a sharp, stabbing pain every time Miss A kicks or pushes on it. I've got bags under my eyes because I wake up about 5 times a night to make the mighty roll over to my other side when my hips start to burn, and I'm breaking out like a 14-year-old.

I'm a beautiful sight.

But you know what's a really beautiful sight?

These kids:

They are just darling, and I love watching them every month. Today was a bit frustrating though, as we found out that Boy B flipped, and is now breech. Miss A hasn't budged from her head-down position, waiting at the exit. She is ready to get this party over with. But Boy appears to be a trouble-maker already and is making things complicated. My doctor said we still plan on a "regular" delivery, since Miss A is first and bigger, which could possibly lead to Boy being delivered breech . . . the doctor would pull him out by his feet very quickly after his big sister comes. This is not something I want, and will be praying my little heart out for him to flip again if at all possible. Fingers crossed.

But they are healthy and growing and still cooking, and that's what matters most.

The number 1 question I get asked when chatting about the twins is if I can feel them separately. The answer is yes, but only because I know one is on the left and one on the right. Some movements in the middle I can't identify. Boy's movements do tend to be more jerky, Miss's are more fluid (for right now, might be because she is bigger). They often move just one at a time, so one side will be going crazy while the other side is still. And when they get moving at the same time . . . it can get a little wild. Sometimes it feels like they are rocking my body around. They also have the tendency to push out away from my body, creating two camel bumps, and it cracks me up even if it kills my round ligaments.

It doesn't show up well on camera, but here's an attempt:

We also get asked a lot how this is all going to work.

Well, there is a plan, and then there is what will happen. The plan is to put them in our room until they are sleeping consistently through the night and have a bedtime routine they can share with Carly. Our room is big, so we'll have the crib in there and a bassinet. We plan on them co-sleeping in the one crib. When they are old enough, we'll get a second crib, either through donation or just buying another one, and put all three of our beautiful children in the spacious master bedroom, and Chris and I will move to the second bedroom (which is a pretty good size, too). That is the plan. Who knows what will actually happen.

We've been given a second carseat, and have received boxes of boy clothes in the mail from outrageously generous friends. I pulled out Carly's old clothes, and we now have mountains of clothes and blankets, pink and blue, waiting to be washed and put into the dresser that Chris's parents are giving us.

To say we are blessed is an understatement, and I have literally been brought to tears several times over the last few weeks when I look at all we have been blessed with in preparation for these babies. We can't express out gratitude at the outpouring of love.

The first few weeks will be extremely experimental, as we adjust to schedules and nighttime feedings and having two newborns and a toddler. I expect pure chaos, but know we can also find joy in it all.

[Carly with "baby brother and baby sister", as she calls them. She came up with that on her own.]

Getting the carseats ready, organizing clothes, cleaning out closets, making shopping lists and to-do lists, and this ever growing belly have shown me something in the last few days: this is real. There are really two babies coming. I still can't wrap my head around this. But as I've said before, my heart is full, and our family certainly wouldn't be complete without them.

[Brushing up on my swaddling skills with my first baby; she squealed "I'm in a cocoon!"]

Less than two months to go (probably).

The countdown is on.

potty talk.

2012-01-08T21:18:00.000-08:00

[And by potty talk, I mean potty talk, so don't read if you don't want to hear about it.]

Let's talk about the potty. Oh, peeps, we've been talking about the potty non-stop in the C House. Day 2 was identical to day 1. Carly did not go to the bathroom in the toilet once. She peed all over the floor several times, as well as in her bus, in the kitchen, on her big dog Cooper. So much urine, people. And she held her #2 in until she was completely stopped up and then it was just a big fiasco until we got her to get it out (not in the toilet, mind you). Day 2 night, Chris and I decided we needed to adjust our strategy. We were doing the "3 Day Method", which was just not clicking. Carly knew how it was supposed to work, she just was not recognizing the signs her body was giving her. As she was peeing, she would inform us. Not before. Not once. It became such a negative experience, that by the end of Day 2, she was becoming completely resistant. Instead of replying with excitement, she would complete ignore our reminders. It was like she just didn't care anymore. And it was pretty apparent that she was afraid of the big toilet, even with her little seat on it.

So we decided to go a different route. We got a little toilet, something I really didn't want to do because 1) it makes it hard to go in public (which we experienced first-hand at church today), and 2) I really didn't want to have to clean it out. But it was needed. We got her a little pink one and it was a hit.

We also ramped up the rewards. Instead of just praise and stickers, we sat out a jar of gummy bears. And instead of reminding her to let us know when she had to go (which didn't work once with her), we took her and sat her on the toilet periodically.

Day 3.

Chris was upstairs cleaning the bathroom. I had to go (luckily, I'm pregnant, so I have lots of opportunities to teach by example), so I brought her in with me. She sat on her potty, I sat on mine. I went and then . . . people, she peed in her little potty. I think I freaked her out by how excited I was. I was just so happy that finally, we had something to smile about. She picked out her sticker, and got three gummy bears, and we ran upstairs to tell daddy. She responded really well, and it seemed like since she finally had a positive experience, and finally did it herself, she finally grasped how it worked.

We had no accidents the second half of day 3 (Saturday), and I was feeling pretty good. The problem was Church was the next morning. We decided to have her wear a pull-up to church, and still take her to the bathroom periodically. But Carly was not going to go in those big toilets, and she held it the entire time. We got home and Carly told me she needed her pink potty. I tried to get her in the door fast enough, but when I was unlocking the door, she looked down and said "I go waters" (oh, we also started calling pee "waters", a term she coined. I wonder if she ever knew what we were talking about when we said "pee"). I was so frustrated, because we were so close, and she did such a good job and I felt like it was my fault she had an accident. Then, right before nap time, it happened again. She said she needed to go to the potty, but wanted her hands cleaned off first (because she just ate), and she had an accident while I cleaned her hands. If I had just taken her straight to the potty. I was so mad at myself this afternoon. I felt like she did her part and I didn't do mine, like I didn't give her the opportunity to succeed. And I didn't want her to feel like she was doing something wrong. It was all I could do to hold in the tears.

This afternoon and evening was met with another success, and more failures as we went to a friends house for a birthday get-together, and Carly was too distracted to think about her needs (thankfully we have friends who don't disown us when our child pees on their floor). I think it is all too fresh, and we need some more time at home getting used to the idea and really getting in the habit before we can venture far.

I've had to adjust my way of thinking with this potty-training thing. Going into it, I thought, we're going to do it, and she'll learn, and we'll get it done. Like it was a step. But it is not a step, at least not in the C House. Its an ongoing process. It really is a whole lifestyle change for Carly, and I don't think I really grasped that until the despair of Day 2. And I feel better about it now, thinking of it as something that she'll gradually learn, like mobility and talking. It has taken some of my anxiety away, and lightened the pressure. And I think Carly, who surely felt that anxiety and pressure, has responded to our new outlook.

The last few days have also taught me a little about being Carly's mom. It has taught me how important it is to adjust what you're doing as a parent to the individual. We started with a plan, and we realized it wasn't working with our girl, and that it was wearing on her sweet spirit and positive personality. It is the first of what I'm sure will be many experiences like this, whether it is helping her with problems at school, or dealing with a moody teenager. You have to adjust according to how your child works, and every child will work differently. It is funny how I used to think nighttime feedings and swaddling were complicated. I'm learning this parenthood thing is just going to get more and more complicated as we go on.

The other day, Chris made a good point. "This must be how God feels," he said. He said that we want Carly to succeed so bad, and its hard to see her try and fail. And you think, If you'd just do it exactly how we told you to, it wouldn't be so hard and you'd be happier! If God wasn't perfect, He would probably think that as He watches us stumble through parts of our lives. I think a lot of experiences in parenthood teach us to understand God and His love for us, and I think that is why parenthood is a divine calling. I just never thought potty training would be one of them.

[P.S. I've thought about 700 times the last three days, How will I ever do this with two kids at once? For the record, I plan on potty training the twins when they are about 5.]

report from the trenches.

2012-01-05T18:22:00.000-08:00

Last night we went to the store and Carly picked out a Lightning McQueen potty seat.

She also picked out Star Wars underwear ("with the robots on it!"),

but they only came in boys, so we talked her into Dora.

Today is day 1.

So far we've had absolutely no potty in the toilet.

And a lot of it all over the carpet.

Maybe that's a lie.

Maybe we've had two tinkles.

But I feel like I listen so hard and want it so bad, it could be my imagination.

We've got a good thing going, Chris and I.

We rush Carly into the bathroom, I sit her on the toilet and try to get her to go a little more and clean her up, and Chris breaks out the carpet cleaner. We're going to have some very clean carpet when this is over.

This afternoon the poor girl got discouraged.

She peed on the floor for like the third time in 20 minutes and started crying and said,

"I just want to go in the toilet!"

She knows exactly what she is supposed to do, and exactly how it is supposed to work.

She just seems to have a hard time identifying the signals from her body.

She seemed to get embarrassed and even downtrodden,

and it is pure heartbreak to watch your two-year-old get discouraged.

We are trying really hard to stay positive and upbeat.

Chris, of course, is better at it than I am.

I think she is "ready".

I wouldn't be trying if I didn't.

She is smart and communicative and "gets" it.

She just needs to catch on.

Honestly, she needs one successful, positive experience, and I think she'll fly.

But we just didn't get that today.

Hopefully we'll all recharge our positive attitudes and start fresh tomorrow.

Here's hoping tomorrow goes a lot better than today.

a whole new year.

2012-01-03T19:55:00.000-08:00

We kicked the New Year off with a bang.

Well, a "bang" by our definition, being the laid-back, pregnant, toddler bunch that we are.

But it was the perfect way to send out 2011 and welcome in 2012.

On New Year's Eve we headed to the mall and made some Christmas returns, did a little shopping, rode the toys even though mommy wouldn't give in and put quarters in them, and threw pennies in the fountain.

Then we headed to Red Robin for lunch, where it turns out they have gluten-free hamburger buns. I had my first restaurant-style burger with a toasted greasy warm bun in 6 years. I was in heaven. Not only that, but I ordered a burger with a fried egg on it, something I've wanted to try since seeing it on Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives. So many dreams coming true all at once.

[Carly and mommy, perfectly defined on the last day of 2011; Carly is a spaz at Red Robin.]

That evening we carried on our tradition of a New Year's Eve finger-food picnic dinner and sparkling cider.

It was yummy, and I couldn't think of a single place I would rather be that evening than having a picnic in the living room with my 2 favorite people in the world. We watched Planet Earth during the picnic, and we think we'll make that a new tradition. It really is fascinating, and Carly loved watching the animals.

[Carly was very excited about the picnic on a blankie.]

Before we put Carly down, we counted down to "midnight" and said "Happy New Year!" and blew on little party horns. Carly loved it and afterwards cheered "Again!". So, of course, we did it again.

After she went down, I tried really hard to watch a movie with Chris, and caught a decent amount of it before I started drifting off. I got ready for bed, and we managed to watch the ball drop before I passed out.

On Monday, we were scheduled to head to the Ikea outside Detroit. But a winter storm was expected, so we decided to put it off. Instead, we headed to a local pet store that has lots of cool animals and a bridge with a little pond with huge fish in it. We looked at the fish and the birds and the bunnies and the mice and the snakes and the frogs and the spiders. We even saw Dory and Nemo. But no matter where we went, Carly just wanted to go back to the bridge and "the big shish!". The store in general was a hit, though, and a perfect little winter outing that I'm sure we'll use a few more times before spring arrives.

We've had a good start to this brand new year.

Resolutions?

I usually make some, though they vary in specificity and loftiness.

This year, I really only have one:

When 2012 comes to a close, I want to have a happy, healthy family of five that is close to each other and close to God, and that has had a year full of wonderful memories.

That's all that matters.

Oh, and I want to run my first real race. Just a 5k. I'm thinking a breast cancer one in October. I miss running so much, and can't wait to get back to the gym.

And I plan to lose around 30 to 40 lbs during the month of March.

Just saying.

Happy 2012.

2011.

2011-12-31T16:03:00.000-08:00

January

Erin starts the new year off like a lot of other people and joins a gym. She begins a work-out regimen and is soon addicted to her "personal time." Carly falls on the ice repeatedly and spends most of the month with swollen bloody lips. Chris begins his second semester at Michigan State and is missed.

February

The family enjoys MSU's first snow day in 35 years. Carly hits the 18 month mark and finally manages to kick the bottle. She also enters nursery. Both milestones are met with very little resistance. After years of Erin's begging, Chris agrees to watch "The Way We Were" on Valentine's Day and begins to reconsider his choice in spouse.

March

The family spends Spring Break in Indiana, and Carly gets her first taste of the Indianapolis Children's Museum. Carly locks mommy out of the house. The family heads to Chicago where Chris and Erin enjoy a Blackhawks game from extremely good seats. Erin shows she is somewhat of a prophetess when she blogs about how life is nice and calm and she's sure something crazy will happen soon.

April

Baseball returns, and so does the sun. Carly looks insanely cute in her Easter dress. Erin and Carly abandon Chris during his busy finals weeks and head out west to party hard and attend the sealing of baby Shayla.

May

Erin and Carly's trip west is filled with fun and family time, but the girls are happy to be reunited with their man upon their return. Chris finishes one semester, and begins teaching classes in another. The family heads to Lake Michigan with friends for a Memorial Day mini-vacay and everyone gets roasted.

June

The family joins up with the extended T family for a beyond fabulous week on the Oregon Coast. Erin is drug away from the beach kicking and screaming. Carly comes home with a massive seal. Later in the month, Chris and Erin celebrate their 5th anniversary with a night away in Grand Rapids, where they go to the Gerald R Ford Presidential Museum (because they're cool like that), see Thor, and go out to dinner twice in one night.

July

The 4th of July is celebrated with a nice weekend in Chicago. Chris teaches classes. Carly loves swimming. Erin gets a positive pregnancy test.

August

Erin falls into a pit of aweful, uncontrolled vomiting. She tries a few different meds to control the situation. Carly spends a week at Grandma and Papa's house to ensure her survival. Chris and Erin attend a wedding that Erin doesn't really remember. The family does manage to celebrate Carly's 2nd birthday, and adds little Harpo, our beloved beta, to the chaos.

September

Chris goes back to school. Erin is no longer puking 5 times a day. Harpo gets fed occasionally. So does Carly.

October

Things are looking up! Erin goes off her meds. Chris is insanely busy. We go to a pumpkin patch and pick out four little pumpkins to represent our growing family. Two weeks later, we learn we should have picked out five little pumpkins: twins are on the way. Erin has an emotional breakdown and Chris leaves town for a conference. Carly is the cutest ghost ever ever ever and loves Trick-or-Treating.

November

Carly won't stop talking about scary ghosts and bats and owls and how they are "coming to the house to get Carly". Erin swears they will never celebrate Halloween again. The family celebrates the news that a girl and a boy will be joining the ranks. Thanksgiving is celebrated in Indiana, where Erin and Carly relax and get pedicures, and Chris spends most his time grading papers.

December

Chris completely disappears during two of the busiest weeks in the history of the world. Carly and Erin pass the time Christmas shopping, painting, and watching the Grinch. Carly switches to a big girl bed with only one rough night. She also becomes completley enamoured with "Green Eggs and Ham" and Erin is soon reading it multiple times a day. Erin is massive. Like, really massive. Christmas break finally arrives, and the family slides down the icy freeway to Chicago for Christmas #1, heads over to Indiana for Christmas #2, then enjoys time at home for Christmas #3. The family enjoys a little calm before the impending school-plus-twins storm.

The C Family looks back on a wild but wonderful 2011, and is very curious and excited to see what in the world will occur in 2012.

Happy New Year.

Santa looked a lot like Daddy.

2011-12-30T19:33:00.000-08:00

Every Christmas, Chris and I make sure to do a little Christmas in our home. We have done this since our first year together. We enjoy spending a "Christmas" as a little family, and I really cherish this now that we have Carly and life is more hectic then it has ever been before. Soon we'll be a big enough posse to stay home for Christmas day, but for now we are still blessed to be with one family or the other and have a mini Christmas at home. Granted, this means a lot of Christmasing, and I think it kind of confused Carly a bit this year, but she's 2 so she rebounded quickly.

My parents sent their presents to our house, and the night we returned from Indiana we prepped for Michigan Christmas morning. I've heard many stories from my parents of Christmas Eves spent assembling all sorts of gifts, and this year was our first go around. Chris and I put together the toy kitchen my parents got Carly. Have you ever heard the song "Santa looked a lot like Daddy"? I had it in my head for about 10 straight days, something Chris really loved, and that night as he assembled the kitchen, it seemed very appropriate.

[Chris manned the screwdriver; I applied the decorative stickers.]

[After assembly and set-up. I heart Christmas Eve.]

'Christmas' morning Carly came down and was very excited about her new "blanket with a city on it!" and even more excited about "my new kitchen!". In fact, she started playing with the kitchen immediately and we couldn't drag her away. We had to let her cook several courses before we could get her to open any presents.

[bringing mommy a sandwich.]

I got Chris some new sweaters and pants and stuff. He need to be spruced up a bit now that he is teaching big time college classes. And he isn't returning a single thing. Go me. He got me . . . nothing. Can you believe that? The man know me well, and he knows 1) I love shopping, 2) I don't want any more clothes until I'm done housing two humans, 3) I heart Ikea, and 4) I'm nesting. So he got me a shopping trip to Ikea. We're going on Monday. I'm more than excited.

[Carly showing daddy the correct technique for optimal present-opening.]

Carly got outrageously spoiled this Christmas. With two sets of Grandparents and parents who got killer deals at our last Ikea trip, Carly ended up with 4 big Santa presents: kitchen, table and chairs set, road rug, and an art easel. Whoops. We decided to keep the table and chairs and easel in the basement until a later date, and after her fascination with the kitchen, we rolled up the rug and took it downstairs too. We'll spread the wealth out a little, and I'm sure a new prize won't hurt when the dynamic duo invade. But next Christmas we'll be more specific about limits, considering we'll have 3 kids and we don't live in a 6 bedroom house.

But she did get some fun little things too. I am a particular fan of the Melissa & Doug wooden "paper dolls". At this point, I definitely like them more than she does, but she'll grow into them, I'm sure.

[Mommy dressing the dolls; Carly wondering when she can get back to cooking.]

The twins were not completely neglected. Aunt Camie knitted two sweet little hats for them, and they are just the cutest things ever. I can't wait until those little heads are in the hats and not in my hips.

And my favorite thing I got Chris? A collage of mementos, ticket stubs, and little love notes from our five fabulous years together. I keep things like that in a little box, and saw this idea on Pinterest (of course, I can't take credit), and think it turned out really cute. I have little things like that from Carly's 2 years of life, so I want to make one for her too.

Yay for Pinterest, because I made my parents a gift with map hearts of important places in their lives, and made Chris's parents grandma and grandpa gifts . . . all ideas from Pinterest. We decided to go the sentimental route with our parents this time around, and I think it was a success. Especially since I'm far from crafty, and none of it required advanced skills.

[Phone pic, but it was seriously cute. I want to make one for us now.]

It was a nice Michigan Christmas, and I'm grateful we make the effort to spend this time together as a little family. We spent most of the day in our pajamas playing and cooking and enjoying time together. When it was over, I was 100% ready for Christmas to be over. We took down the tree that night, and I'm loving how big and clean our living room feels now. I always love Christmas decor, but I really love taking it down. Carly came down the next morning and was so sad: "But where did my Christmas tree go?" she kept asking over and over in the saddest little voice.

[Big towers from Carly's new giant pack of Mega Blocks.]

It was a truly wonderful Christmas season, and we are very blessed. I always struggle with January, and I'm sure this year will be no exception, but at the same time, we have a lot to prepare for and look forward to in the coming months. Chris and I talked about how it is funny because usually Christmas is kind of the "main event", the pinnacle of excitement. While this Christmas was wonderful, and I am just loving having my man home right now (please, school, don't come back too fast), Christmas was in a way another marker in time as we count down to this year's real main event. I'll give you two guesses to what that might be, but you'll only need one.

xoxo.

a Christmas story.

2011-12-28T09:27:00.000-08:00

Christmas Eve arrived and we got in our most festive attire to celebrate.

I have to tell you, I found these red shoes and Target and liked them more than a friend. Luckily, Carly shared my sentiments and wore them ALL DAY. During her nap they were on the table right next to her bed. They couldn't go too far. Nothing like a pair of red shoes.

It is a tradition in Chris's family to go out to breakfast on Christmas Eve, so we headed out to Cracker Barrel. There were pancakes and biscuits and gravy and eggs and sausage and chocolate milk galore. A ton of food is always a good way to commence holiday celebrations.

Carly was a big fan of the Cracker Barrel game, but the wait for her blueberry pancakes was pure torture for the poor girl.

We came home and spent the day napping, playing games, watching movies, and baking treats.

We played a great deal of Scrabble, though my pregnancy brain was struggling and my best word was "tinkle". Carly liked to sit by us and "play letters" with her own set.

Carly was also a very helpful baking assistant.

At last, evening came, and Christmas Eve traditions got into full swing. The presents were brought down and organized under the Christmas tree.

Papa read the Nativity story. Red Baron and Towel had the honor of playing Baby Jesus and the swaddling clothes, respectively. Carly is so sweet with babies, and showed Baby Jesus lots of love.

Then there were Christmas Eve jammies and pictures in front of the tree.

And we all settled in for a long winters nap.

All day we told Carly that "tomorrow is Christmas" and "Santa is coming tonight". When morning came, she exclaimed "It's Christmas!" She caught on pretty well. Some crazy part of me thought Carly would stay in her pjs for present opening, and I explained that everyone would be in their pajamas. No, she insisted, she needed a dress. Of course. So we put on her Christmas dress. For the record, I did try to keep her in her pjs.

We came upstairs and Carly saw the presents and asked, "Where's Santa?"

I guess we didn't explain that he would come AND go before we woke up.

Present opening commenced.

First, stocking presents.

Then the big Santa presents.

And then the rest.

Carly was pretty funny, because she just wanted all the presents open. She wouldn't initially be that interested in what the present actually was, just what would come next. She liked the act of opening the presents more than the presents themselves. But that changed after all the presents were open. She loves her new Repunzel doll, which came with a matching dress-up dress. But I think the biggest hit may have been one of those little wind-up fishing games, where you catch the fish with a magnet fishing pole. Probably about $2, but she loves it and asks, "Wanna go fishing, mama?"

Chris and I were also very spoiled. I may be most excited about our video camera, as Carly does all sorts of cute stuff these days, and we've got two more subjects to film coming soon. Chris was pretty pumped about a bunch of new socks.

After presents, we got all dolled up and headed to Church. I have to admit, I was a grump about having Church on Christmas, but the music and talk given were beautiful, and I was grateful for the opportunity to feel the Spirit on the day we celebrate the Savior's birth.

Oh, Carly's Christmas dress. I have to admit, I'm obsessed with it. Labor Day weekend we went to Cracker Barrel and looked around at the little country store in the front while we waited for our table. And there was the cutest little Southern-style smocked Christmas tree dress. Our years in the South turned me into a sucker for cute smocking. I loved it, but we left without it. I have thought often of the dress in the months since, and every time I looked at Christmas dresses, they paled in comparison. So I got Carly a gray sweater dress and figured it would do the job when paired with those fabulous red shoes. But on Christmas Eve at breakfast, we saw the dress again . . . and it was 50% off. I used my charms on Chris, and we brought it home. I say it was well worth it, because she looked so insanely cute. And its a little big, so she'll probably be able to wear it as a top next year. Oh, and we know we're having another girl, so Little Miss A will have one adorable Christmas dress waiting for her in a few years.

After Church came naps, movies, games, and pizza.

[Papak snuggling with Red Baron.]

[Repunzel and Carly watching Repunzel.]

It was a nice Christmas.

We are blessed.

let the festivities begin.

2011-12-26T16:09:00.000-08:00

{It probably won't come as a surprise, when you take into account how insanely adorable our child is, to hear that we took about 8,000 pictures over the last week. So I decided to cut our Christmas festivities (which are still continuing, by the way) into a few different posts. Enjoy.}

We left Lansing on the 17th. Chris's weeks from h-e-double-hockey-sticks were [mostly] complete, and the plan was to head down to Chicago for the annual extended C family Christmas at Chris's grandma's house. Now, it had not snowed for probably two weeks, and I didn't even think to check to weather. So, of course, we woke up to snow. We headed out anyway, and fishtailed down the freeway. Our 3 1/2 hour trip took nearly 5, but we made it without ending up in a ditch, which not everyone could say that day.

Chicago Christmas is always a fun event. Chris is the oldest out of a big gaggle of teenage/early twenties cousins, a majority of which are girls. There is a lot of food, and a lot of fashion. As the only little child, Carly gets a lot of attention. And I get a lot of relaxation.

[Carly checking out her stocking at Baga's house.]

[waiting for her turn to open her present.]

[checking out Baga's loot.]

After a weekend in Chicago, we headed to Indiana. We spent the week playing, sleeping, eating, decorating sugar cookies, singing Jingle Bells, and even made a visit to Santa Claus. Chris also spent a few days and a late late night finishing up a major paper, but we erased that from our memory bank.

[Despite appearances, Carly loves filling the bird feeders with Papak.]

Can I just say . . . the world is coming apart at the seems. We went to visit Santa at the mall. Now, I'm not a huge "visit Santa" person, and don't have a single childhood memory of doing so. But we got a classic picture of Carly screaming on Santa's lap last year, so I thought maybe we'd get a happy one this year. And Carly kind of gets Santa this year, so I thought it would be fun and get us in the jolly spirit. But, no. The mall required us to pay $20, the price of the minimum "package", if we wanted to take a picture with our own camera. There is something wrong with that. And the line was taking forever because the parents were making their kids pose over and over again and looking at the picture on the computer screen. I understood, because these parents were paying at least twenty bucks, but it was so commercial . . . all about the picture, not about the experience. So I decided to stick it to the man, and not take a picture. Instead, we'd just talk to Santa. But I was disturbed by the world my daughter is growing up in.

[pictures while waiting in line were free.]

[can't wait to see Santa!]

When it was our turn, Carly marched right up to Santa with no fear. She handed him her towel and said "This is my white towel. It has red stripes on it." He looked highly confused and said "Oh!" in a very nice way. But he didn't ask what she wanted for Christmas. So I suggested she tell him.

She said, "Presents!"

"What kind of presents?" he asked.

"Christmas presents!" she responded.

And then she was done.

So Carly introduced towel, requested Christmas presents for Christmas, and then headed out. The whole thing took a whopping 30 seconds. Yay, for Christmas spirit. At least it makes for a funny story.

[Chris's sister may or may not have snapped a paparazzi picture from a distance.]

After nearly a full week of playing and waiting, by the time Saturday rolled around we were ready for the main event.

[to be continued . . . oh, the suspense.]

O Holy Night.

2011-12-24T15:04:00.000-08:00

I woke up too early the other morning, and couldn't fall back asleep.

My hips hurt.

My back hurt.

And my babies were moving.

My thoughts wandered to another expecting mom.

I thought of Mary, the mother of Jesus, riding a donkey, of all things, all the way to Bethlehem.

I just can't imagine.

I couldn't even make it through the entirety of Sherlock Holmes without going to stand in the back of the theater.

Oh, the things mothers do for their children.

She was a very special mother.

And she had a very special Child.

I'm thinking of them tonight.

I hope you are too.

We hope you have a very Merry Christmas.

Lots of love.

xoxo.

A little bit about the little bits.

2011-12-15T15:35:00.000-08:00

Here we are, approaching 26 weeks. I probably have just 10-12 weeks until these kids make an entrance. I'm hoping right at 37 weeks. I'm not sure my emotional and physical state will last much longer than that, but of course I want the babies to be full term. And 37 weeks happens to be Chris's Spring Break, which would be incredibly convenient.

I went to the doctor today. I'm now on a schedule of going to the doctor every two weeks, with an ultrasound every other visit. Its a nice little perk, getting to see the babies more. But it means a lot more time spent in a doctor's office. And since each ultrasound takes about 45 minutes, it also means it is impossible to take Carly with me. Thank goodness there have been no shortages of offers to watch her.

The babies are so big! They don't even fit on the screen anymore. Oh, they grow up so fast. They are so cute though. We saw Baby Boy cross his arms in front of his face a few times, like "No pictures, please" and Little Miss put her hand up to her mouth. A thumb-sucker like her big sister? I hope not. Baby Boy (on the left) is wrapped around my left side and his legs go across the top of my tummy, so he's the one who keeps putting his rump in my ribs. And Little Miss is down tucked away on my right, probably to blame for the serious pain I've got going on in my right hip and lower right side of my back.

[was harder to get good pictures this time, but how cute is baby boy's nose?]

But they look great. They are both just under 2 lbs, with Little Miss at 1 lb 15 oz, and Baby Boy at 1 lb 13 oz. Meaning they've both gained over a pound since we last saw them. Wowzah. One of my main worries lately has been that they would grow unevenly. But they are doing well, and the doctor said since they each have their own placenta, that isn't a big concern.

They are also both still head-down, something my doctor thought was great. He said at this point we'll continue to plan on a normal delivery, and that the babies usually come less than a half an hour apart. I have to admit, the thought of delivering two babies back-to-back makes my head spin, and I have split feelings. I kind of got used to the idea of a scheduled c-section, and all the "conveniences" that come along with it; you know, actually showering before you go to the hospital (which I hadn't done for 2 days when I had Carly . . . . oops) and knowing exactly when the babies will come. Of course, I also had a lot of concern over it, as a c-section is a major surgery requiring major recovery. I actually had a wonderful birth with Carly, with a labor that lasted 12 hours from start to finish, a lovely epidural, and not-too-extensive pushing. But my recovery was long and drawn-out and far from smooth, and that is something I was thinking I'd get to avoid. But honestly, the more I think about it, I just figure there is no easy way to get a baby out (or two babies!) so I'll just go with the flow and know that luckily Heavenly Father knows how every baby is supposed to enter this world.

Not much has changed for me. Normal all-day nausea and really tired. Getting bigger and bigger. Having a hard time sleeping these days, since my side goes numb or my hips hurt or the stabbing round ligament pains. Pretty much your standard third trimester delights, just a bit earlier. I've actually come to find the whole thing fascinating and quite amusing. With Carly I remember often thinking "it is amazing how the female body was designed to do this" and now I often tell Chris "the female body was just not designed to do this!" It is a fun, very unique experience. That's how I feel right now. Catch me on a bad day and there is a chance my attitude will be different. I've also begun to grow out of the maternity clothes I wore with Carly and borrowed from a friend, which cracks me up because we're still two weeks out from the third trimester. The whole thing is just beyond fabulous. For reals.

Today after I picked Carly up, I told her I went to the doctor to see the babies. She said, "No two babies, just one baby. A boy baby." I said, "What about the girl baby? Don't we need her too?" "Yeah," she replied, "we need girl baby too." She's right. We need them both.

For the record, we love them a lot.

A little bit of Carly, at 2 years 4 months

2011-12-11T20:10:00.000-08:00

Carly is a chatterbox. She talks a lot. The other night the three of us were just sitting on the couch before she went up for her bath and she was just talking away. It is fun to hear what comes out of her mouth. I'm always so curious what goes on in that brain. She likes to inform strangers. An encounter at the store often goes "I'm Carly. And this is my white towel. And this is my [insert color] dress. And that's my mommy. And this is my pretty hair." The stranger is usually pretty shocked by so much info coming so fast, but it cracks me up every time. If asked, she will also inform you that there are "two babies in mommy's tummy. A boy baby and a girl baby." Though, the other night someone asked her how many babies were in mommy's tummy and she confidently replied "Four!" Thank goodness she's not right.

She is getting a little harder. She is more opinionated, but I feel like she can't quite express her opinions as clearly as she'd like, and I get a lot of "No!" and whining and refusing to do what I ask or suggest. Her wardrobe is one battle, and her coat is another. She does not like wearing a coat. This morning we had a 10 minute stand-off before church over the coat. I won in the end. I don't see a coat as something that can be compromised, given how the temperatures have dropped. But it drives me insane. She also has zero patience. I mean, she decides she wants milk and it is: "Mommy! I need milk! I need milk! I need milk!" We're working on her asking nicely and being patient, but patience has never been her strong point (but is any 2-year-old that patient?).

Carly is not particularly good at playing with other kids. She really just plays around them, and sometimes it makes me worry a little. I know she will learn, and having two little siblings will help that a lot. She is just so used to playing with adults, with us and aunts and uncles and grandparents. And adults listen to her and do what she says, while kids, obviously, don't. I think she doesn't get why the kids don't interact with her the way adults do. But I've seen sparks of interest in other kids here and there, so I'm sure it will get better eventually.

[chilling at library story time.]

The big girl bed? She is a pro. Napping and sleeping at nights with no problem. And she calls for me in the morning and waits for me to tell her she can get out. Most of the time we still put her in, just like we did with her crib. But sometimes she climbs in all by herself and gets under her covers, and it just pricks my heart with how big she is.

She loves painting. Like, really loves painting. Right now we paint on the floor, but I'm really excited for the present we got her so we don't have to do that any more (and my back is excited, too). She likes to build with blocks, and loves the tinkertoys at Chris's parents house. She still loves all her stuffed friends and sleeps with a whole posse of them in her bed. She still loves towel, and Red Baron is still her BFF. She loves Family Home Evening and often says "let's play home evening!", which means she gets out her nursery book and shows me pictures and tells me what they are: "this is the kids . . . this is a big temple . . . this is Jesus . . . this is Joseph Smith . . . this is a family . . ." She is a ridiculous daddy's girl. It is painful sometimes. She will be Mr. Hyde with me and as soon as she is with daddy it is all Dr. Jekyll. Chris always jokes that he thinks I'm making it up. It drives me nuts sometimes, but at least I get some peace when she's with daddy :).

She remembers everything. Some afternoons she asks to "play balls" or "play with the green ball", two games that take a whole lot of energy. If I can't manage it, I'll tell her she can play when daddy gets home. Hours later, daddy comes home and the first thing out of her mouth is "Time to play with the green ball!" She also talked to her uncle and aunt a month or so ago on the phone for a minute. The last time we saw them was in Oregon, and Carly asked Aunt Kasee, "Are you playing in the sand?" I couldn't believe she still remembered that. She is not going to be one of those kids I say something to in hopes of her forgetting it.

[very serious about the orange ball at our beloved dollar store.]

I do love how communicative she is. It is fun to be able to have a conversation with her. And she says some things that crack me up. So of course, some of her greatest hits:

Me: "Who says Ho Ho Ho?"
Carly: "The pirates!" (get it? they say "yo ho ho". smart girl.)
~
Chris locked his keys in his car one night so we had to go up to campus with the spare. I told Carly we had to go help daddy, and during the drive she kept saying "I need to go rescue my daddy!"
~
We told her it was time to set up the Christmas tree. She put her little pointer finger in the air (which she does when she is being very serious) and said, "But first, we need . . . decorations!"
~
She is actually really good at sequences. She will often say "First, we need to ___, and then we will ____." It is obvious I do that a lot with her.
~
She was telling me a story and started off "Once upon a time, there was a mystic dragon . . . " I said "A mystic dragon?" And she said "Yeah! A mystic dragon" very seriously. I have no idea where she got mystic from. Probably Dora.
~
Another story started off "Once upon a time there was a mean mommy wolf, and she was sad!" I said, "Maybe she is sad because she needs a hug." Carly said ok, and came and gave me a hug. Does that mean I'm the mean mommy wolf? Haha!
~
We were folding laundry and she pulled Chris's pants out of the basket. "It's daddy's pants! I'm going to take daddy his pants," she said. I told her, "But daddy is at school." She replied, "But, I think he needs his pants." Very true, he does need his pants.
~
Same laundry folding party, and she holds up my undies. "What's this?" she asked. "That's mommy's underwear," I said. She replied, "To keep you snug and warm." Yes, I suppose so.
~
She has become very bashful about "doing her business" and prefers to be alone when doing so. She will go into another room and if I follow her in, she will put up her hand and say "Stop! You go in the other one room!" And if we're in public she'll go hide in a corner and do the same thing: "Stop! You go over there!"
~
And my very favorite of all.
I was giving her a big hug and I said "I love you more than the sun and the moon and the stars." She replied, "I love you more than the sun and the moon and the stars and the planets." Brilliant and sweet.

[such a crazy beauty.]

More than anything, Carly is pure joy to be around. She is full of life and goes at full speed. She has the sweetest nature. I've been increasingly excited to see how she will be with the babies. I like that she'll be a little "older" (if two and a half is really that old) when they are born, because I think she understands a little bit more than if she were younger. The other day at playgroup she was rocking a baby in her carseat and making faces at her and laughing, and the baby just had this big smile on her face the whole time. There will be challenges, but I think Carly's fun personality and naturally sweet and loving spirit will serve her well as the big sister of twins. It is obvious to me that she was specifically designed to be perfect for such a task. Every day I just can't get over her. Even when she makes me want to explode with frustration, I am just so grateful for our days together, and for the opportunity to watch her learn and grow and turn into this big little girl that we are so incredibly proud of.

For the record, we love her a lot.

maybe Christmas means a little bit more.

2011-12-07T07:21:00.000-08:00

We've been getting our Christmas on here at the C house. The decorations are up, the stockings are hung on the wall with care, and the tree finally managed to get ornaments. The top section of lights went out, so we strung some colored lights on it to make it look a little better. I suppose a $20 Walmart tree isn't meant to last 6 Christmases? Ours is definitely hanging by a thread. I was feeling a little lacking in our Christmas decor. Everything we have is from our first or second Christmas. It is simple and lacks all that pizazz you see on Pinterest and in decorating magazines. We watched the First Presidency Christmas Devotional on Sunday night while sipping eggnog, and, as prophets have a tendency to do, President Uchtdorf told me exactly what I needed to hear. He spoke of all the decor and planning and presents and perfect expectations we place on Christmas, and said that without fail, something doesn't go as planned.

"As a result, the Christmas season is often a time of stress, anxiety, frustration, and perhaps even disappointment. . . "

But he said if we open our hearts, the Spirit will show us that Christmas means more than the minor things of life that we use to adorn it.

"We realize in these precious moments what we feel and know in our hearts--that Christmas is about the Christ."

Because the fact is, Carly's eyes still light up when she sees the lights on our meager Christmas tree. She still circles the tree pointing and identifying different ornaments. She points to the stockings and excitedly exclaims "Daddy stonking, mommy stonking, Carly stonking!" And she is learning of a special baby that was born on that very first Christmas so long ago.

Christmas is also about service. I've been trying to make it a habit to give a little to the Salvation Army bell-ringers whenever we see them. Carly is mostly interested in the "jingle bells!", but I try to explain the reason for giving. A few days ago, I was at a gas station filling up. A woman approached me and asked if I had any cans or bottles she might have to exchange for money for gas. I told her I was sorry, but I didn't (which was true), and went on pumping gas. She went on digging in the trash cans. As I drove away, the words of King Benjamin echoed in my head: "For behold, are we not all beggars? Do we not all depend on the same Being, even God for all the substance which we have, for both food and raiment, and for gold and for silver, and for all the riches which we have of every kind?" (Mosiah 4:19). How hard would it have been to lock Carly in the car, keep an eye on her, and walk 10 feet and put $10 of gas in her car? Am I not blessed enough that I could have managed that? It bothered me all day, and still bothers me, and I resolved to try a little harder to be a little better. Not only at Christmastime, but all the time.

And Christmas is about thinking about others. The recent sudden passing of an acquaintance I haven't seen since high school has me praying for and mourning with a young wife and little children I've never met. Cancer and sicknesses continue to impact those who we love, as well as people we don't know; stories that are abstract to us, but painful realities to others. Chris has some incredibly busy weeks during these final weeks, but when I think of how lucky we are, and how many people are having very difficult holiday seasons, it just makes me want to hug my little girl harder, complain a little less about my back pain, and count my blessings when I see my husband walk through the front door, even if it is 3 hours later than I would prefer. Because this Christmas, not everyone has that luxary. And all I can offer them is prayers.

Christmas is about joy. It is Carly's first Christmas where she is kind of "getting it", and it is so much fun. I think because our last encounter with presents was my birthday, she seems to think Santa Claus is only "bringing presents for mommy!" It is sweet though, because she is excited about it, and she asks if she can open mommy's presents too. I have assured her many times that Carly will be getting presents from Santa too. In fact, Santa is seriously excited about giving her her presents. I think of them down in the basement and can't wait to give them to her. Its not about the presents, but it is fun to see a child so innocently excited. Having Carly adds a whole new magic to the Christmas season, and as we celebrate her third (third!) Christmas, my heart swells to think of all the fun Christmases we have ahead of us with her and her little siblings.

[what you get when you tell the girl to smile.]

Christmas is about family, whether you will be sitting next to them, or sending your love through the mail and over a webcam. I look forward to fun times and upheld traditions in Chicago and Indiana. I still struggle daily knowing I will not see my side of the family at Christmas time, but I'm grateful to have a family I love enough to miss so much. And I'm grateful they will miss us. And I'm grateful for the two little reasons we cannot go. And I'm grateful that we'll get to see my parents when those two little reasons make their way into the world. So while Christmas will be hard without those Idaho mountains, I make it a point to remind myself of just how blessed I am.

But above everything else, as President Uchtdorf said, Christmas is about the Christ. It is about trying to be a little bit more like Him, being a little more grateful for the life He lived, and for the Sacrifice He made. And it is about celebrating the night of His birth, perhaps the sweetest story in all of scripture.

"And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn. . . .

And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men."

the big switch.

2011-12-05T11:21:00.000-08:00

When we found out we were expecting another baby, I felt like Carly needed to be out of her crib and potty trained by the time he/she arrived. As time progressed, and I was so sick, I changed my mind and decided both could wait until she was three. She slept so well in her crib and having two in diapers wouldn't be that bad. But then . . . of course, we found out our one baby was two. The more I thought about it, I realized 1) there was going to be a lot of chaos in our house (hopefully somewhat organized chaos) when these two babies arrive, and Carly doesn't need extra major changes in her life during that time, and 2) I don't want to deal with major changes in her life when I've got baby twins. So I decided to get the changes underway and hopefully be fairly adjusted before the dynamic duo show up.

Step 1. Big Girl Bed.

Taking the crib down was a little emotional. How are we doing this already? It seems like yesterday we were driving home at 5 mph with that crib tied to the roof of our little Civic. It seems like not-so-long ago I was celebrating her first full night in it, swaddled and tiny and sweet. And now she was helping daddy take it apart.

Chris's parents replaced a twin bed with a queen just in time for us to inherent the twin. We set it up on Saturday. It has a bed frame with a head and foot board, but it makes the bed so tall, we decided to start out with just the boxspring and mattress. I figured the fall was a whopping 6 inches, so if Carly fell, we could dust her off and plop her back in bed with no harm done. Upon initial set-up, Carly loved it. She got right in her covers and pretended to go night-night and brought books and read stories. In fact, I couldn't get her out. Carly has been an incredibly easy child, so I was getting my hopes up this would be another simple transition.

We followed her bedtime routine and tucked her in and . . . silence. I hoped for victory and went to bed. Probably around 3 am Sunday morning, Carly started screaming "mommy! mommy!" I expected this, so I went in to find her flipped all the way around so her head was where her feet started, on her tummy, with her arm and leg off the side of the bed. So she didn't fall off, but was in the process of almost doing so. I repeat: she did not fall off. I picked her up and rocked her a bit and put her back in bed. She screamed. She would not let me leave. I kept trying to give her towel and Red Baron but she refused to take comfort in them. The child was so traumatized by her near fall. Eventually I got her to stop screaming, but she laid there sucking her thumb and her eyes wide open, not blinking. Jump forward AN HOUR and we're still there. Chris volunteered to sleep on the floor by her, which I really didn't want because it would create a habit, but I was desperate so I told him to go for it. She still wouldn't sleep. The three of us went in and out of conciousness for a few hours, and soon it was 6:15 and Chris had to get up to get ready for Church meetings. She screamed right when he left. I went in and tried to be all firm. I tucked her in and tried to walk out despite the screaming. I said "Carly, it is night night time!" in my most serious mom voice. She said "Ok" and started silently sobbing. Like, terrified silent sobbing. Obviously, I couldn't walk out on that. I went over and gave her a hug and kiss and laid on the floor where Chris had been. She was silent, but I could hear her heavy breathing and sucking thumb. I drifted off, and when I came to, her breathing had evened and her thumb-sucking had stopped. She was asleep! I army crawled, yes . . . army crawled out of her bedroom. Not easy when you're 24 weeks pregnant with twins, but it wasn't worth the chance of her seeing me. I collapsed into bed. It was 8:00. So we were up pretty much from 3 to 8. The worst night with her since she was probably 3 weeks old. She woke up at 9:30, and we made it for the last 2 hours of church. Carly, of course, was full of energy. Chris and I . . . zombies (did I mention Chris was up until 2 doing homework, so he got a whopping hour and a half of solid sleep that night?).

It was only one night, but walking into church I was on the verge of tears. How on earth were we going to make these adjustments in time to be ready for the twins? Should we just set the crib back up? Should we buy a bed rail? Ah, more money going to something that might not work. I dropped Carly off at nursery, and she started screaming. Not typical of her these days, so she was obviously exhausted. I stood outside the door, waiting for her to calm, and within 5 minutes two tender mercies occurred. One sister in the ward brought me three new baby boy footy pjs. A really kind offer, since she literally just had a baby boy. But she said they had way too much stuff, and knew we didn't have any boy clothes. It was small, but it was so kind. A few minutes later I was chatting with another sister in the ward and the topic of our rough night came up. She said they had a bed rail that we could borrow. And her husband would bring it by after church. What a blessing it was.

After Church, Carly took a nap in her new bed with no problems. She slept two hours, and so did we. Before bed last night we put the rail up. I don't know if it made her feel safer, or if it really kept her in bed. But last night she slept all night. From bedtime all the way to 8:15. Maybe, just maybe this will work. Maybe we just had one bad night, just so we could see what it was like (fingers crossed). Another ray of hope? Carly doesn't get out of her bed and wander. In fact, when she wakes up she still calls for me. Granted, it has only been two days, but I'm taking that as a good sign for now.

Now that we have one bad night and one good night under our belts, I will tell you, I'm glad we're doing this now. I'm glad we're not getting used to this with two babies in the house, and I'm glad we didn't have a night like Saturday (and probably more to come) with newborns to feed and change. I wanted that crib like a junkie wants his next fix at 5 am on Sunday morning, but last night's good night sleep is making me feel a lot better about it all. And so proud of our big girl.

As for potty training? Since we don't get to go west after Christmas, we will have a wonderful 10 days at home in Michigan with just our little family of three. It is something I'm really excited for, my little consolation prize since I don't get to go home. It will be our last hurrah as a family of three. But . . . since daddy will be home for 10 straight days, it will also we a good time to start potty training. So I'm not the only one scrubbing pee out of the carpet. And Carly will be nearly two and a half by then, so I don't feel like it is too early to hope it will work.

And official twin preparation will begin in the New Year, too. I feel like there is a lot to do, but want to enjoy Christmas time without too much stress or too much busyness. And really, we've got time. But come January, you better believe the nesting bug I've been repressing will be released.

Until then, cheers to many more nights of uninterrupted sleep (unless you count the potty breaks and hip pain, of course).

battles and wars.

2011-12-02T15:11:00.000-08:00

This is what happens when daddy dresses Carly in the morning:

Ha! Actually, Chris is good at dressing her, and it was sure nice to have him home to do it! This is actually what happens when your child demands a dress EVERY SINGLE DAY.

You see, in my long two years of parenthood, I've learned to pick my battles. When fall came and temperatures cooled, we set aside some money to get Carly fall clothes. I got her jeans and leggings and long sleeved shirts. But Carly had spent the majority of the summer in summer dresses, and she was not about to let them go. Every morning was a battle. Screaming and crying . . . needing a dress, not those lousy jeans. And every morning I would give in, thinking a) she'd get over it, and b) it wasn't worth the stress. Well, I was right on one account: it wasn't worth the stress. Is she over the dresses? No. Every morning, one of the first things she says, still standing in her crib, is "I need my dress!". So we put shirts and leggings on under the sleeveless summer dresses. Some of them are short enough now that they are kind of like tunic tops anyway. She looks ridiculous sometimes, but for the most part, we pull it off pretty well. I probably look like one of those moms who forces her girl to wear a dress every day. But I have searched high and low for simple cotton long sleeved dresses. Why is this such a foreign concept? Even sweater dresses have short sleeves. Bizarre. So long sleeved dresses are on the list for anyone who requested ideas for Carly, because we need to mix it up just a little, and our supplies are dwindling.

Another battle is still raging in the C House. Eating. Sweet, delicious dinner time has become a time of pure dread for this mama. Carly is a notoriously lousy eater. I always say she is a lousy eater and a mighty fine sleeper, so I'll take it. But as she gets older, I feel like she has to learn to eat, and this little battle has become an all out war.

She eats pancakes, fruit, peanut butter and honey sandwiches, and grape tomatoes without fail. Expand beyond that, and you're asking for a fight. I stay pretty basic for breakfast and lunch, but I'm not going to plan dinner around those foods (umm . . . impossible), and like I said, she needs to learn to eat. If she only wasn't so stubborn. Yesterday was a prime example. I made spaghetti squash and steak. I've found one trick to get her to eat is include some sort of sauce to dip things in, because she likes sauces. So I make up her little plate and include ketchup to dip her steak in, and corn, which she usually likes. She eats about 5 kernels of corn, eats just the ketchup off her fingers, chugs her milk, and declares that she is done. This is common behavior, and often we say you have to eat so many bites, then you can get down. She wasn't having it. We were supposed to decorate the Christmas tree, which she was very excited about, so we told her she had to have two bites before we could decorate the tree. TWO bites, people. I even got her a new little plate with only two bites on it. She sat in that chair screaming for about an hour. Chris and I both finished our meals and left the kitchen, and she sat. Finally, it was bath time. We didn't get to decorate the tree. She never ate those two bites. We took her out of the chair, put her in timeout, showed her how now we don't get to decorate the tree, and she went straight to the bath, no worse for wear, really. I cannot wrap my head around being so adverse to eating TWO BITES that she would sit there for an hour. And this is not the first time we've had a dinner table stand-off, though it is the first time she didn't end up eating her bites. But this is a battle I think is more important than what she prefers to wear. Its about developing healthy eating habits and getting used to a variety of foods. Its about showing respect to the person who makes your meal. But at the same time, she is just two. I don't know. Any tips with this one? That doesn't involve preparing her a separate meal every night, because I'm lucky to get one meal on the table, to be honest.

[she is seriously in love with her "yellow smiley balloon". a dollar well-spent.]

The thing about our sweet Carly is she is so stinking smart and cute, and she knows it. I can't get enough of her: her words, her faces, her giggles, her ideas. She is pure joy in a dress. Except at dinner time.

first snow.

2011-11-30T15:04:00.000-08:00

We got our first snowfall last night.

And, boy, did it fall.

When we headed out this morning it was a ways past my ankles.

It was so beautiful with the bright sun and blue skies.

I love December snow

(and could totally live without January/February/March snow).

We also got our first Christmas card yesterday.

Snow and a Christmas card?

Is it possible winter is here?

I have to tell you, all the sudden time is flying.

Considering how slowly the first 17 weeks of this pregnancy went,

the last 6 were gone in a blink.

I have a few goals for December.

Play a lot.

Christmas a lot.

Soak up every possible moment with my sweet girl.

And don't stress.

Not about presents

or travel

or babies

or a clean house

or the fact that I probably won't get Christmas cards out.

Because its Christmastime!

And it only comes once a year.

And its awesome.

a series of fortunate events.

2011-11-28T10:58:00.000-08:00

[Just finished . . . and this is the longest post ever. I should have split it up, but now it is done and I don't want to go back and redo it. Feel free to read in segments . . . like a good book.]

I'm not going to lie, I needed a vacay.

It seems that as a stay-at-home mom, where many days are similar, and some days are hard to fill, every few months its nice to have a change of scenery, and some other people to entertain your kid.

Cue Thanksgiving vacation.

The weekend before Thanksgiving, Chris's sister Becky came up to visit and brought Carly's big girl bed (an inheritance from his parents). We had MSU football tickets for that Saturday, so she offered to watch Carly and Chris and I headed out to cheer on the Spartans.

We were season ticket people at BYU, but Big 10 football is a whole different story in terms of craziness and prices. Then throw a kid into the mix, and we decided just one game a year would be a good tradition. This year we lucked out, and Chris's adviser offered us tickets. He has season tickets: front row of the upper deck, right on the 50 yard line. They were incredible seats, with nothing in front of us but air and football. We had a lot of fun, and the Spartans killed Indiana U. So while there was very little suspense, there was a whole lot of offense. Works for me.

Chris's days before Thanksgiving were shaping up to be busy ones, so Carly and I hitched a ride with Becky back to my in-laws house to start our vacay early. It is good we did, too, because Chris was on campus until 2 am and 11 pm, and got all sorts of things accomplished without a pregnant wife to cook for a toddler to chase around. We were willing to make the sacrifice, and go eat food that I didn't have to cook, and go shopping and see Breaking Dawn and play with aunts and puppies and swing with Papak and bake pies with Grandma.

Chris finally arrived Wednesday night and I sure was glad to see him. Before we knew it, Thanksgiving was here. Chris and his sister Jenny went on their traditional Thanksgiving run, then he was kind enough to walk laps with his massive wife. We had a delicious traditional dinner in the company of the sister missionaries, one of whom was German and tested Chris on his slipping language skills, and the other had my little brother as a district leader in their last area. I was kind of rooting for Elder T to be in my in-laws hometown come Thanksgiving time, but the sisters made for nice company, too. Carly was not a fan of the handshake thing, though, and tried her hardest to give them hugs and kisses.

[Sammie was really hoping my FIL would slip up and drop a massive amount of turkey.]

The day after Thanksgiving, our little family of 3 (errr . . . 5?) loaded up and headed down to Cincinnati for the day. Two of Chris's childhood friends/college roommates were home for the holiday. We all got married around the same time, and now all have kids they we haven't had the chance to meet, so we decided to go visit for a mini reunion. It was fun to see friends and reminisce on the good old days. Carly and Kaden are only two months apart. It took her a little bit to get warmed up to him, but by the time we headed back to Indy, Carly was asking "Where Kaden go? Where Kaden go?"

[some of the posterity from Roman Gardens #329]

After a big lunch of BBQ ribs and queso and chips, and lots of playing, we headed out to UDF to get malts. This is apparently a big event, and Chris's UDF chocolate malt brought tears to his eyes. Carly was a fan, too.

Then we bid farewell to our friends and headed to the nearby Ikea. I was dying to go because there were a few things I wanted to get Carly for Christmas there. I told Chris I needed 30 minutes and $30 dollars. Let's just say I doubled one of those estimates, and tripled the other. That store is way too much fun and so cheap. But now Carly will actually be getting presents from mom and dad for Christmas. I'm way more excited to give her her presents than to get any myself, but that is what Christmas is all about, right?

Oh, a cute story. At Ikea, all the soft toys were 50% off. You know Carly takes her stuffed friends very seriously, so I thought maybe we'd get her a new one. We went around to all the bins. "Do you want to take this one home?" I would hold them up and ask. She would give hugs, but say no. Then we arrived at a bin of beagle-looking puppies. "Take that one home!" she said and pointed. I grabbed one. "No, that one!" she said and pointed. I went through about 7 or 8 different dogs. Mind you, they were all identical. Finally I reached the one. "YEAH!" she said and gave him a big hug and tucked him under her arm and walked off. I guess she knew he was supposed to be in her posse. Later in the car we were trying to name him. I rattled off about 15 names and Carly said "nope . . . nope . . . nope" to every one. Then Chris says "How about Buster?". "YEAH BUSTER! I love Buster!" Now we have Buster.

[Carly and Buster on our way back from Cincy.]

We drove back to Indiana that night, and got just enough sleep to head out on our next adventure.

Carly's first pedicure.

Chris's three sisters, mom, and I were having a girl party, and I was torn whether to bring Carly or not. I was a little afraid she would freak out, or get hyper and create all sorts of chaos. Turns out she was a pedicure natural. Don't know why I didn't expect that. She is quite the diva.

Carly was clear from the get-go that she wanted pink toes. But once we got there, the yellow started to sway her. I didn't really like the idea of yellow toes, so I found the best pinky pink I could, and she was sold.

[picking our colors. Carly got pink and mommy got dark purple.]

[a little nervous, but showing off her pink.]

It totally cracked me up that they did the works: soaked her feet in the "blue bath" (as Carly called it), shaped her nails, gave her a massage. It was the complete package . . . for a two-year-old. They had kid chairs with little DVD players and after Carly got used to what was going on, she was much more interested in Scooby Doo than in the foot massage.

[why is she touching my feet?]

Her toes ended up really cute though. And she made a point of showing off her "pink toes" the remainder of the day . . . and all the days since. In fact, later that day I went to put her shoes on and she freaked out when I covered her pink toes with socks. How dare I?

Then Carly got a sucker and sat back to watch her movie and mommy got a turn. I have to say, a foot and calf massage and a massage chair are just about all a sore pregnant lady can ask for.

It was a fun girl trip, and I'm glad I was convinced to take Carly.

Later that day we attempted family pictures and it went something like this:

Ha! No, there were some cute extended C family pictures, but the little C family had less success. We'll have to give it another go.

We ended our week-long vacay with Five Guys on Saturday night. I have a very special place in my heart for Five Guys. I try not to daydream about it on a regular basis.

We had a wonderful Thanksgiving break.

It reminded me that everything is ok, and that everything is going to be ok.

Carly and I went to the mall one day, and I made my first twin purchase: matchy newborn hats.

It was therapeutic.

It was physical evidence of how blessed we are.

And that life is fun and exciting, even when it is crazy and scary.

Hope your Thanksgiving was fab.

an attitude of gratitude.

2011-11-18T10:53:00.000-08:00

This week for Family Home Evening we talked about being thankful. I started to explain "being thankful" to a two-year-old, and, well, not a lot came to mind. It seems like gratitude defines itself. I finally said it means being happy when someone does something for you or gives you something and you need to tell them 'thank you'. Then we stressed how it is especially important to say thank you to Heavenly Father, because He gives us so many blessings. Carly proceeded to jump on the couch.

Then we made really fancy thankful turkeys by tracing our hands.

[Carly's turkey. She came up with it kind of on her own. I decided it is ok to be thankful for yourself.]

In times of stress and change and worry, it is easy to lose track of just how blessed I am. Its easy to dwell within myself, and forget how many things in my life bring me joy.

I am grateful for unpierced ears. As a little girl, I really wanted to get my ears pierced. My dad was against it, and always told me that when I was 18 and moved out of the house, I was welcome to pierce my ears. It made me mad as a kid, and by the time I was a teenager I just didn't think about it anymore. Since turning 18 and leaving the house, I think I have considered piercing my ears each year at my birthday. Earrings are fabulous and can really jazz up a simple outfit. But whenever I consider it, I know I never really will. My unpierced ears, in my personal situation, are a symbol of a fathers love. They remind me how lucky I was to be born to loving parents, who taught me and loved me and showed me the way. I am grateful I was raised in a better family than I really deserved.

I am grateful for a messy bedroom. I have some character strengths, and being an organized person just isn't one of them. It is something I have really tried to work on, but all too often my weaknesses win out. Even when I pull the rest of the house together, our bedroom often remains neglected. After all, no one really ever sees it, right? I am blessed to have the most patient, selfless husband in the world. He spends long hours at school and work, and comes home to super daddy duty. He loves me despite my endless weaknesses, and while he is a much neater person than I, he never complains about how my clothes are all over the floor or how I don't make the bed when I wake up 3 hours after he does. He gets me, and that is not always an easy thing to do. I can't imagine life if I had never found him. I'm grateful for my best friend.

I am grateful to live "in the middle of nowhere". I felt that way a little bit, when we contemplated moving to Michigan. Michigan? Really? Isn't that like the tundra? Do people even live there? But I love it here. Summers are beautiful, falls are breathtaking, and winter was really not any different than an Idaho winter. There are so many incredibly kind people here, and I feel blessed to have come here and made many friends so quickly. I'm grateful for a good ward and for playgroups and for a close little library and for monthly girls' nights out. I'm grateful that Chris is in a top-rated challenging program. He probably wonders why we chose the harder path sometimes, but we know this is where we were supposed to be, and so many doors have opened for him and his career in the short time we've been here. In today's world, the more employable you can make yourself, the better, and I am lucky he is willing to work so hard to make our life plans possible. We are so blessed that we were led to the middle of nowhere.

I am grateful for unlimited text messaging. I grew up with three brothers, but never felt like I missed out on having a sister. I had my mom, and she was every bit the mom and sister I could ever want. It is hard to be away from her, but the poor woman gets more random text messages all day then she probably wants. It is nice to always be a few buttons away to share random thoughts, funny stories, hard times, and, heaven forbid, a million different baby names. All the things we might we able to talk about if we were able to meet for lunch every week. I am grateful for my friendship with my mom, and the way it has taught me to form a friendship with my daughter. I hope she always trusts me and loves me the way I trust and love my mom. I'm grateful for moms and daughters.

I am grateful for the House of the Lord. We had the wonderful opportunity to go to the Temple on Saturday, and it was something I desperately needed. I think it is impossible to worry in the Temple. It is impossible to feel sad or stressed. It was one of the few times in the past few weeks when I have felt 100% calm and excited about the twins. Of course, I am excited, but being 100% calm is not an easy thing to achieve. But in the House of the Lord, I was reminded that I promise to commit my life to the Savior, and in my current role, committing my life to the Savior means raising these little spirits He sends to our home to follow Him. It is my calling, and if I have nothing else to give in life, I pray I can at least help get these spirits back to Him. In the Temple I was reminded that was my single most important job. And while that is quite the job, it put the worries about strollers and feedings and lack of sleep and two kids doing everything at once for their entire lives in perspective. And I remembered that I need to retreat to the House of the Lord more often.

Happy Thanksgiving.
I hope you have a fabulous week.
And get to relax.
And eat a lot of food.
That's my plan.
xoxo.

the art of worrying.

2011-11-17T11:07:00.000-08:00

Well, I'll do my best not to beat this having twins thing to death. But it is kind of preoccupying whats going on in my mind, so forgive me.

I went to the doctor today. It was our first visit since I found out about the twins (didn't see him after either ultrasound). It was nice to finally talk to him. I've been so worried about everything under the sun, and he has this attitude like, don't worry about anything unless it happens. He plans on a natural delivery at or after 37 weeks. That's it. I've been thinking of every extreme situation that might happen, and worrying about a c-section. But he said it really just depends on how the babies are, and at 20 weeks they were both head down. Who knows what will happen, and twins still have a 75% c-section rate, but it is really nice to have a doctor who acts and sounds like he expects everything to go routinely. It is a nice counterbalance to the pure panic I've had going on. Oh, and in case you're dying of curiosity, my tummy is as big as if I was about 33 weeks pregnant with a singleton. Which means it grew about 9 cm in 3 weeks. More panic. I pray my body can handle the physical strain that is coming my way.

Like I said, I've been stressing. But it is this weird stressing, where I find a way to worry about anything. We go to storytime at the library every week and this week the night before I was so stressed about what if we were late, or what if Carly didn't sit still and listen. Um, its storytime for little kids, no one sits still. I just worry worry worry and its making it hard for me to be happy in general. Yesterday I was telling Chris I was stressed because I couldn't think of anything I wanted for Christmas. For reals, it was stressing me out.

Then there are things I feel somewhat warranted in worrying about, though worrying won't fix anything. I've been thinking a lot about how I will be required to split time between my babies. When I found out I was pregnant, I was already worried about splitting time between Carly and the new baby. But now I'll have to split time between the two babies too. One of the most precious things about having a newborn, especially your first, is that you can just sit and snuggle and nurse and just drool over them all day long. That was such a sacred (yet very difficult) time with Carly. I look at parents at church with babies who pass the baby back and forth in an effort to take care of older kids and calm the baby down. We won't have that luxury. When I'm home, at all times one of my babies will not be held. I feel like I won't get the same experience with them, and it already hurts my heart to think of spending half as much time snuggling each baby.

I worry about my general mobility. After having Carly, one of the things that saved me was the fact that we lived across the street from a mall and I could just pack her up in the travel system and go window shopping. Just getting out of the house was a huge emotional boost. Getting a toddler and an infant out of the house seemed daunting, but getting a toddler and two babies out of the house seems downright impossible. We're not going to be able to go anywhere. Ever. And I don't know if that is going to be harder on me or Carly. I wonder if I'm ever going to be able to go home again. Flying alone with a baby, I did. A toddler and a baby. Ok, maybe. A toddler and two babies? Ummm, no. We were looking for flights to go home for Christmas, and I never felt good about actually buying any. I thought it was because of the prices (which were high) but then we found out about the twins, and it made sense why I was getting the feeling not to fly at that point in my pregnancy. Its a little late when considering a twin pregnancy. So who knows when I'll get home, and while I'm grateful we have family within driving distance, it is hard to think how long it might be before I get back to Idaho.

And worst of all, our garbage disposal is broken. The kitchen sink is clogged and it is hardly draining at all. We don't think we can run the dishwasher because it is connected to the sink somehow, and can't hand wash very many dishes at a time because the sink fills up. And the maintenance men are backed up a few days because half of them are on vacation. My kitchen is a disgusting mess and we have no clean dishes. I honestly think if I could wash my dishes, it would release all my other stresses. Don't underestimate the power of a clean kitchen.

That's all.
Gratitude post tomorrow.
MSU football game Saturday.
Vacay starts Sunday (for me and Carly anyway; Chris has to wait until Wednesday).
Good plan.
xoxo.

friday fluff.

2011-11-11T11:31:00.000-08:00

I dare say today may be the laziest day of my life.

We've spent is watching tv and playing with all sorts of things in all sorts of ways.

We have no food and I tried to find the motivation to get to the grocery store.

I asked Carly if she wanted to go and she said, "No, thank you."

That convinced me.

But it is 11-11-11 today which is kind of fun and makes me feel like we should do something significant.

Maybe we'll go get a milkshake tonight.

If we can scrounge together something for dinner.

[11-11-11 at 11:11. special moment in time.]

So, look at this cleverness.

We don't use a bumper.

It is a personal preference, but we do have a crib set and the bumper is of course the cutest part.

I wish they had this when I was having Carly and that I knew I wouldn't use a bumper.

The side of the sheet has a pattern like a bumper.

Isn't that cute?

Love this pennant one.

And look at this, too.

I love it.

I think I'll be due for a necklace upgrade when the twins arrive.

And I think this would make a good "push present," don't you?

{I'm still waiting for a push present for having Carly. ha!

Whenever I see something I want I tell Chris "It could be my push present!"}

That is literally as exciting as we get today.

Hey wait, I just remembered I vacuumed.

Carly didn't even cry and run away.

In fact, she held the cord for me.

Such a helper.

Looks like we were productive today, after all.

Happy weekend.

We are headed to Detroit tomorrow to attend the Temple.

Together.

Its been too long since we've been, and really too long since we've been together.

And we decided we better learn how to utilize teenage babysitters.

Fingers crossed Carly is an angel tomorrow.

xoxo.

the best of both worlds.

2011-11-09T13:12:00.000-08:00

Well guess what?

It's a GIRL!

And a BOY!

Yes, it looks like the C House will be enjoying the best of both worlds.

We had a wonderful experience at our ultrasound this morning. The tech took care of the important things right away, and checked for gender first. She checked Baby A . . . a girl. She looked just like Carly did. Then she checked Baby B, and wow . . . he was all boy. I could tell before she even said so. We are so happy about having another little girl, because we sure do love the one we've got now. And adding a little boy to the mix feels so surreal. What are we going to do with a boy? I don't know, but at least I won't have to worry about gluing a bow to his head.

Our ultrasound was long. I mean, you want them to be long, but it was really long. Checking twice the babies really is twice the work. But it really gave us a chance to watch the babies. I know they are still in utero, but we believe babies are born with personalities. Carly certainly was. Little Miss A was calm. She let the tech do her thing, and once put her hand right up to us like she was saying hi. Baby Boy B was really active and the tech said she had to chase him around to get measurements. We watched him open and close his mouth and cross and uncross his legs. I could have guessed that, because Triple B is on my left and I've spent many nights feeling the left side move while the right side is quiet. Miss A is lower and on the right, so she will most likely be coming first (which got her the "A" label in the first place). They already seem to fit the "big sister/little brother" mold, like he was teasing her and she was just putting up with him, and have a teasing but loving relationship. They kept their heads together the whole time. Every time she swept past their heads, you could see the two circles right next to each other. It was the sweetest thing. They love each other, and boy, do we love them. They both look perfectly healthy and are measuring right on time. They are both estimated to be about 12 oz, which is good because they are growing at an even rate. They are also both the size they would be if they were singletons, which is why their mama is ginormous.

Speaking of the mama, I hit 20 weeks on Sunday. It is fun to celebrate half-way, though I'm probably a few weeks beyond half way since twins are considered "done" at 37 weeks. I feel like I've gone from the dreadful first trimester right on to the third. I've got a big belly, back pain, a numb tailbone when I wake up, and sore hips. And we're at 20 weeks. Its becoming very obvious that carrying these two will be a whole different experience then carrying one. But I get TWO at the end, so I'll take it. My nausea continues but it is what it is. Very similar to how I was with Carly. It is no longer debilitating, and I can for the most part carry on with eating and cooking like normal. Except chicken. Ew, chicken. We're expanding our meat horizons around here because right now I just can't do chicken. The exhaustion is what is really getting me these days. I. AM. SO. FREAKING. TIRED. All the time. But tired is better than vomiting, so again, I'll take it.

I feel a little like all of this is a bit unfair. These babies look healthy. We are getting a son and a daughter. So many people are offering so much help. I'm knocking on wood as I think this, but things are just good right now, even as my constant fear of preterm labor and bed-rest loom. I am just very very grateful for this wild and wacky adventure we've got going on. Very grateful.

behind door number two:

2011-11-06T16:19:00.000-08:00

A new car!

I've mentioned before we are blessed to be surrounded by incredibly generous people. Four of those people happen to be our parents. You see, we don't actually own a car. The beautiful little golden Honda Civic I've been driving around for the past few years belongs to my parents and is on perma-loan while we're in school. Well after our big twin surprise, we realized three car seats wouldn't fit in the back of a Civic and we weren't sure what we were going to do.

On Halloween, I got a phone call from my dad.
"Are you up for a visitor?" he asked.
"What?" I replied.
"I'm on my way!" he said.
"On your way where?" I asked.

My dad happens to drive a Honda Accord (at one point after my little brother left for his mission we had 5 Hondas for 4 drivers), which has a more spacious back seat. He offered to trade us cars so we could squeeze all three kids into one car. And, after checking his schedule and considering the impending winter, he decided that right then was the best time to come. So he hopped in the car and drove. From Idaho to Michigan. In a day and a half. Twelve hours one day, thirteen the next. Just to give us his car.

He came Tuesday night, spent the night, played with Carly Wednesday morning, and was off again by lunch time. He got home two days later, just before the first snowfall out west. Turned out it was perfect timing.

We sure liked having Papak here, even if it was only for a few short waking hours. I will admit making the actual switch was kind of emotional for me and I may or may not have cried. That Civic was such a good little car. I've grown attached to it. It came with us when we moved from Utah to Tennessee, then from Tennessee to Michigan. It took Carly home from the hospital, and Carly had taken to calling it "Carly's car". When my dad drove away Carly said "Papak taking Carly's car?" And I cried a little more.

But my new ride is pretty classy, I'm not going to lie. I feel a little self-conscious driving it. It is 5 years newer than the Civic, and has all sorts of upgrades like a jack for my iPod and a heater that works really well. And Carly has even become fond of it: "my new car!" she says, and gives it hugs.

I am lucky to have such an incredibly selfless and generous, though slightly insane, man as my father. We would be nowhere without his (and my mom's) generosity (literally, like we wouldn't have a car so we wouldn't go anywhere). Thank you, thank you dad! We love you and we're glad we got to see you. Carly was asking "where Papak go?" all day.

Our twins are lucky. Not because they are coming to me, but because they are coming to a fun daddy, a wild big sister, and a whole network of family ready to spoil them rotten.

Speaking of the twins . . . Wednesday is the big day. What do you think: two girls, two boys, or one of each? Cast your vote. I think its two girls, but would kind of like one of each. But I was also convinced Carly was a boy, just for a point of reference. Chris thinks it is a girl and a boy. Random people like to guess two boys, but I think that is because we already have a girl. I can't wait to find out. Like really can't wait.

Happy Sunday! Does anyone hate Daylight Saving as much as me? This getting dark at 5 is lame.

That's all.
xoxo.

this is Halloween.

2011-10-31T18:12:00.000-07:00

I'm not going to lie.

I woke up this morning kind of Halloweened-out.

I feel like it has been going on for 31 straight days.

I think Carly felt the same way because when I told her today was Halloween she replied:

"NOOOOOO!"

But she changed her mind when I told her she got to go Trick-or-Treating again.

Or as she might say "Trick and Ming-ming".

Next year my plan is to have a shorter, more focused celebration the week of.

We've been watching all sorts of Halloween entertainment. We still watch too much tv in the mornings, when I'm getting my barings straight, and I managed to DVR Halloween versions of Dora, Diego, Bubble Guppies, and Max and Ruby. We also rented movies from the library and enjoyed Garfield's Halloween a few times. See what I mean by Halloweened out? But Carly is really soaking it all in. All week she has been telling me about ghosts and monsters and bats. On Saturday the girl was talking my ear off about "scary bats that live in a dark cave and they are coming to my house!" It is pretty cute. She doesn't seem particularly scared, even though sometimes she will say "Oh! Thats scary!" Halloween in a strange holiday.

We did meet all the Halloween requirements this year though.

We carved a pumpkin.

Well, Chris carved a pumpkin.

The smell made me gag, and Carly was totally suspicious.

But Chris did a really good job making a "traditional face" as I directed him to.

[not so sure about those pumpkin guts.]

[finished product.]

Carly seems to like it now that it is completed. Whenever we go out she says "Its the Halloween pumpkin! Hi, Halloween pumpkin!"

On Wednesday Carly and I headed to the playgroup Halloween party. With that much sugar and that many kids, I didn't manage to take any pictures. The games were a little old for her, but Carly and another girl her age had fun knocking bowling pins over . . . sometimes using the blow-up pumpkin, sometimes just their hands. Carly had half a sugar cookie, then discovered the clementines. She ate 5 before I cut her off. That's my girl. But I was dying over that half-eaten sugar cookie.

I debated for a while on what Carly should go as. It is probably her last Halloween where she will have no preference, but it is also the first where she actually understands whats going on. I finally went with a ghost. I saw an idea on Pinterest and all together it would cost about 7 bucks. I put my limited craftiness to work, and voila: a seriously cute ghost. All week she has been perfecting her "BOO!" and it has become especially robust. She is a very convincing little ghost.

[a ghost and a pumpkin.]

Friday night was the ward Trunk or Treat. I ate about 10 bowls of chili, then we headed out in the freezing cold to make the rounds. She was a pro Trick-or-Treater. And you could tell she thought it was just about the best idea ever. She had a huge smile on her face and kept showing me her bucket and saying "Look! I got candy!" I love her sweet innocence.

[ghost Carly and chick Kennedy.]

[seriously spooky.]

And finally, we arrived.

October 31st.

This is Halloween.

Tonight we headed over to the house of some ward friends, had a quick dinner, and headed out on Carly's first real door-to-door trick-or-treating experience with a group of ward kids. In the future, I'll be the mom who sits at home and eats candy and hands it out to trick-or-treaters. But I didn't want to miss it when she is so young and cute.

[ghost and mummy . . . errr, mommy.]

[beautiful Halloween night.]

[doing her thing with one of the ward young women.]

I'm finding kids these days don't really say "Trick or Treat" nor do they say "Thank you." They just run around holding their bags out. We made sure Carly said both at every door. I just think it is polite, and I want her to know its about the tradition and experience, not about how much candy you can get (off my soapbox now). But she was seriously cute, and we let her go to doors without too many steps or other kids by herself. I just can't believe what a kid she is.

It has been a fun Halloween season, but I'm ready for some holidaylessness before we start in on Thanksgiving. And Carly's poor ghost tutu . . . after three celebrations, it barely survived the night.

Oh, and in case you were wondering . . .

the twins were skeletons this year.

Happy Halloween!

out of the fog.

2011-10-30T17:53:00.000-07:00

[drooling over this little beauty. wish they'd let me sell plasma so I could save up for it.]

We've had an interesting few days. I spent Thursday in a complete haze, not truly processing our big blessing. Chris left for a conference dark and early Friday morning. When I woke up on Friday, my warm fuzzy haze was gone. I was left with nothing but panic. I cried by myself. I cried with Carly. I cried to my dad. I cried to my mom. I felt completely overwhelmed and incapable. Friday night Carly and I went to our ward Halloween party and a friend said to me that she thought that the Lord is really honoring my motherhood, because He wouldn't send this blessing to someone who couldn't do it, or to someone He didn't trust to do it. She doesn't know it, but she was an answer to scared prayers.

What is truly amazing is how quickly and smoothly questions are being answered. From cars to cribs to clothes, family and friends are quick to offer advice and help. I don't know exactly why I thought we'd be doing this alone. Because we definitely won't be doing this alone. Along with offers of material goods, we've had lots of offers to help, and have two grandmas already making room in their schedules to come be our twin team. We are so blessed to be surrounded by incredibly generous and loving people.

We feel calm (mostly). We feel at peace. We know these babies are supposed to come now, and they are supposed to come together. And if an angel came down and offered to send them 3 years apart instead, I wouldn't take him up on it. Because this is right. And now that we're out of the fog, we can keep on keepin' on and find joy in this crazy journey. Its strange to think this is our new norm: planning for twins, preparing to be a family of 5, and praying for 2 healthy babies.

xoxo.

A and B.

2011-10-27T17:26:00.000-07:00

The Story.

This morning I dropped Carly off with Chris on campus and headed to my typical every-four-weeks doctor appointment. It was all routine. I went off my anti-nausea meds, and have been doing better, but have still felt sick, so he said to go ahead and try the Unisom/B6 combo (which many of you recommended. thank you!). Then he went to measure my tummy. At 18 weeks 4 days, it was measuring 24 cm. "I feel so much bigger than with my first one," I informed him. Then, while listening to the heartbeat, he checked for 2. But he only heard one. He asked if I was 100% sure about my last period. I was 100% sure. He decided to do a quick "take a peek" ultrasound to see if my the dates were somehow off and I was further along then we thought.

I went into the ultrasound room. The tech squirted the jelly and asked if I wanted to know what I was having. Kill me, people. Yes, I wanted to know so badly, but Chris wasn't there, so of course I would wait for the anatomy scan. But she had some other information for me. "Well," she said. "That explains why you are measuring big. You have two babies in there."

[tops of their heads. took this on my phone, I'll scan more later.]

"Two babies?" I asked. Then I started hyperventilating and tears streamed from my eyes. To be honest, I wasn't totally surprised (something I'll talk about in a minute), but it is still completely life-altering to be told you're expecting twins. She checked them real fast and found my due date was about right. They both had beautiful heartbeats that were about the same heart rate, which is probably why the doctor couldn't hear two different heart beats.

They are beautiful. And there are two.

I headed out to the check-out desk to change my anatomy ultrasound appointment (since there are two, the scan will last twice as long). I informed the nurse and I must have looked shocked because she and another nurse laughed and said I'd be ok. Then she asked my name and I said "my name?" I honestly couldn't remember right then. She asked about a time for the scan, and I had to call Chris to see if it would work for him. Yes, Chris found out he was going to have twins over the phone. "There are two babies," I told him. We set the new appointment for one day earlier (November 9th . . . but, hey, a day is a day!) and we'll find out what we're having then. I'm going crazy wondering what they are, so by they I'll probably be certifiably insane.

I picked Carly up and shared the pictures with Chris. Neither of us had much to say. We are in joyful shock, and I've been in a haze most of the afternoon. As he strapped Carly in to her carseat I pointed out, "We can't even fit three carseats in here." The first of many realizations we'll be having over the coming months.

One Million Thoughts.

My head is spinning and my heart is full. I'm shocked, but not surprised. I have felt like there were two for sometime. Maybe it was wishful (?) thinking. I thought because I was so much bigger this time, and so much sicker this time, that there had to be a reason. But lots of people get big and sick and only have one baby. But something just kept whispering the idea of twins to me, and the thought wouldn't leave my mind. I joked about it with Chris often, which is probably good because maybe it got him used to the idea. It got me used to the idea. I just wasn't that surprised when she told me. I'll chalk it up to the one time in my life mother's intuition was successful. I read online that only about 20% of mothers of twins report increased sickness. I'd like to think I'm a part of that 20%, because that makes the idea of someday having number 4 (maybe, in a long, long time) more possible. And don't think I haven't thought of this as "two for the price of one", because even if it sounds bad, I definitely have.

[sorry these pictures are kind of ghetto. 18 weeks with Carly (left) and the twins (right)]

That doesn't mean I'm not terrified. We thought we'd have one more baby in school and wait a while for number 3. We already had what we needed for a baby, so we could manage one more. Two more, at the same time, was in no way part of the plan. We have a car problem, and a bedroom problem (probably can't fit twins in our closet), and a supplies problem (we only got one infant carseat and crib the first time around, go figure). The logistics are enough to drive me crazy. So right now I'm just not thinking logistics. I'm just thinking about two sweet babies.

And then there is all the worry. I worry about the babies. They are healthy now (as far as we can tell), but multiple pregnancies carry an increased risk of preterm labor and premature delivery, bedrest, and other complications. I'm already worried about carrying these babies as long as they need to be carried. And then how are they going to get out? Good grief.

And I'm worried about Carly. Her world was already going to be rocked. She is the center of our universe, and she gets a whole lot of attention. How is she going to handle a baby invasion of not just one, but two babies? I don't want her to feel ignored. I don't want her to feel like I don't have time for her, or the babies are taking over. I always want her to know how much we love her and how she is just as important as the twins. I'm sure it will take a conscious effort, but I pray we can make the transition without too many bumps and bruises. She is my BFF, and I hope she always knows that.

More than anything, we feel joyful and blessed. It is still crazy to think about, and I don't think it has really sunk in, but for me, these babies are miracles. We have no history of twins in our families. It is just completely God's will, and that alone tells me we can do this. (Sometimes I have no idea what God is thinking . . . .). I don't know how we'll do it, but we will. And we'll have three beautiful children to make every day worth living.

Yay for babies.
xoxo.

leaves.

2011-10-22T19:24:00.000-07:00

sweet things.

2011-10-19T13:57:00.000-07:00

We just keep on keepin' on in the C House.

Chris has had the week from H-E-double hockey sticks and we are all counting down the days until things calm down after a conference he is going to next week. Halloween will be a celebration of many things.

Carly and I are hanging.

I've been doing better, and its a blessing.

Still sick and exhausted, but that's how I was the whole time with Carly.

I'll take it.

I am still on my meds, though, and hope to go off them this weekend.

Third try is the charm?

Fingers crossed.

We've had some sweet happenings around here though.

I found a cleaning schedule on Pinterest.

I've been doing it just over a week and love it.

Most cleaning schedules give you a million things to do a day.

This gives you one or two doable things.

I'm not much of a cleaner when I'm not pregnant,

and you should have seen our house when I was really sick.

Yikes.

But I feel like the house has actually been pretty clean for a week.

Thanks once again, Pinterest.

I just made pumpkin chocolate chip cake.

I'm the world's worst baker.

I mean, I burn everything and make a huge mess.

Chris has even said I have a lot of gifts, but maybe baking isn't one of them.

Ha!

But he also says when it works out, it tastes good.

But I baked this cake 10 minutes less than the recipe called for because of by burning history,

and it is still well-done on top.

Serenity now.

Anyway, here's hoping it tastes good.

Deux has been begging for it all week.

[aftermath.]

The mom of one of Carly's nursery classmates told me the sweetest story.

She said their family recently got a beta fish, and let the little boy name it.

They asked, "What do you want to name the pretty fish?"

The little boy said, "Carly, because Carly is my favorite."

Then the mom said she thinks the boy has a little crush on Carly.

I thought that was the cutest thing.

There is now a fish Carly.

And human Carly is already attracting suitors.

Heaven help us.

[we love Cooper.]

On Sunday we were headed out to go to a trail for a Sunday walk.

Half-way to the car, Carly tripped and fell face-first into the choppy pavement.

The result was shredded lips and lots of blood.

I scooped her up and started rushing back to the house.

I put my hand under her mouth, and soon it was covered in blood.

Carly looked down and started screaming "Mommy's hand! Mommy's hand!"

She thought my hand was bleeding, and even though her mouth was hurting,

it was my hand she was worried about.

Talk about an example of selfless love.

No wonder the Savior teaches us to be as little children.

She is the sweetest thing of all.

four little pumpkins.

2011-10-16T18:52:00.000-07:00

pumpkin patch

family visitors

cold wind

donuts

cider

honey crisp apples

fudge

fall beauty

[can you believe how much she has grown? nearly a foot!]

And four little pumpkins:

daddy

mommy

Carly

baby

one

happy

weekend

a funny story.

2011-10-14T11:58:00.000-07:00

Carly has three little chapsticks.

She carries them around in a little plastic Twins helmet.

You know, the kind you get soft-serve in at baseball games?

Anyway, she calls them "my make-ups", and I taught her how to put it gently on her lips.

Well, sometimes she is less then gentle and I end up wiping chapstick off her face and cheeks.

No big deal.

A few weeks ago I was doing my make-up.

Sometimes I let her look at my stuff while I do it.

Sometimes she draws on my neck with eyeliner and sometimes I forget to wash it off before we go to the store, but what can you do?

On this day she found my stick of green makeup that balances out red blemishes.

And she mistook it for her chapstick.

I wasn't looking, but she looked in the mirror and exclaimed:

"Oh, no! My face!"

I cannot remember the last time I laughed that hard.

And, yes, the real makeup was WAY harder to get off than the chapstick.

Happy weekend.

quarter of a century.

2011-10-12T13:50:00.000-07:00

Oh, yes, it was my birthday last week.

Twenty-five years old.

Doesn't that sound old?

And yet young?

Sometimes I still feel 16.

Actually, a lot of times I still feel like I'm 16.

Where has the time gone?

I suppose in my 25 years I've managed a happy childhood (ok, that was my parents' doing), formative school years with friends and fun, a college degree, a happy marriage to a wonderful man, and 1.4 kids. I'll take it.

My birthday was a fun albeit simple one.

Chris gave me the most superb gift I could ask for:

he came home for 5 hours in the middle of the day.

It was a dream come true.

[Chris took over the "this day in history" on my bday. he is so blinded by my charm.]

He came home after his morning class and we headed to Bob Evans for breakfast.

I still can't stop thinking about it.

And Carly downed 5 blueberry pancakes and a sausage link like it was nobody's business.

Don't come between the girl and her pancakes.

[in the zone. she didn't look up or make a peep the whole time.]

After that we headed out and perused a furniture store (its a long story, but no, I didn't get the couch I wanted for my birthday. poor me), then headed home and put Carly down and Chris and I just hung out. A novel idea. We'll have to try it more often.

Then Chris was off to his night class, and I took a birthday nap before Carly woke up and we headed outside for a sidewalk chalk extravaganza where I was required to draw 5 kitties.

Dinner was my very favorite enchilada casserole.

No dessert.

I've found sweets make me sick.

I'm just not into them right now.

Isn't that sad?

I make up for it with chips and guacamole, don't you worry.

Then we settled in to watch the Penguins season opener.

Isn't that sweet they started the season on my birthday?

I thought it was a kind gesture.

[darling family portrait.]

Like my present from Chris?

A Sidney Crosby jersey.

Some girls gets flowers, I get sports apparel.

I was way excited and surprised because they are kind of expensive.

We have been really wanting to take a getaway trip to Pittsburgh and see a game, but with how sick I've been this pregnancy, the timing of the baby, and finances, it just wasn't going to happen this year like we hoped.

So this was a good replacement.

[the 2-year-old and the 25-year-old.]

I was actually spoiled with gifts, and have shopping money to get my fall style on whenever I have time to go by myself. One of my favs was this print from my sister-in-laws:

[lovely dark phone picture, sorry.]

I saw it on Pinterest, and thought it was so cute.

Of course, it will make more sense when we are no longer in Michigan, but you get the point.

Michigan has really become our home in a way that other places never really were.

We love it here, and I wanted a little memento of that.

That was it.

My simple yet fabulous 25th.

I am blessed.

Here's to year 26.

stick picking.

2011-10-10T10:00:00.000-07:00

I seem to be experiencing early-onset nesting.

Its complicated when you have nausea, complete exhaustion, and nesting going on all at once.

It mostly ends up in me making Chris move furniture around.

But the good news is our living room is now rearranged, and it feels bigger, and the big window is no longer partly blocked and it lets in all sorts of Fall light.

The next step is a bookshelf-cube switheroo.

Carly's cubed shelf is coming downstairs and I'm getting bins to provide some toy organization.

And the bookshelf is going up to Carly's room in an effort to control her ever growing collection of books.

We are strongly considering putting the baby in our walk-in closet.

We measured and the crib fits in a way that would leave all sorts of room to spare,

and I could see it making a very cute tiny nursery.

I learned last time around that babies don't need nearly as much as you think they do.

I also learned that the more everyone sleeps, the better.

So maybe everyone having their own space would work best at the beginning.

We'll see.

Along with the nesting has come the desire for seasonal decor.

I pulled out our Halloween decorations on October 1st (practically a tradition).

But I was looking for some more Fall-y natural decor that could go into November.

That led us on a stick hunt.

I decided to collect sticks, though I didn't really know what fabulous craft I would do with them quite yet.

But turns out it was a perfect mommy-daughter-get-outside-no-more-Dora activity.

We walked over to our mini walking path forest area nearby.

Carly was an avid stick collector, even if some of her finds were closer to all-out branches.

We brought our treasure home and Carly instantly knew to dig in the dirt with the sticks.

Is that inborn?

By lunch time she was covered in dirt, leaves, and stick particles.

A successful afternoon.

The sticks sat on our front step for days.

It looked like we were going to build a campfire.

I wanted to do something, but wasn't feeling the energy.

I remembered a large glass vase I have, that I thought would be cute to fill with pine cones.

The sticks won.

Presto!

A stick bouquet.

It looks nice and Fall-y on our kitchen table.

Though, Carly asks to play with a "big stick" every time we sit down to eat.

Oh, and I just thought of the irony of "nesting" and collecting sticks.

If I wasn't currently functioning with half my brain, I would think of something clever to say about that.

Alas, you win some, you lose some.

xoxo.

everything.

2011-10-07T13:48:00.000-07:00

Our Church held it's semi-annual General Conference this past weekend.

Its always a chance to relax, escape from the world,

and hear messages from people we believe are representatives of God.

Our weekend involved some amazing apple cobbler, meals with friends,

and an incredibly well-behaved toddler.

Our internet went out 5 minutes after noon on Saturday.

I mean, the Choir was still singing the opening song.

Nice timing, right?

We ended up listening to the Morning Session on my phone, which did not make for easy listening.

Chris was playing with Carly while I lied next to the phone.

Its been a hard few months, and I needed this Conference.

Through the static I heard my favorite talk of the whole Conference.

And my very favorite one-liner, perhaps ever:

"This is a paradox of man: compared to God, man is nothing;
yet we are everything to God."

-President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, You Matter to Him, October 2011-

We are everything to God is now on frequent replay in my brain.

Because sometimes its easy to forget.

one-third and a week.

2011-10-02T16:00:00.000-07:00

I don't know if you heard, but my first trimester ended a week ago.

It's kind of a big deal.

We are now just over a third of the way there, and its amazing how time can simultaneously drag and fly. Being sick causes it to drag. Having a toddler causes it to fly. And I'm thinking the holidays will, too. I've officially decided March is the best time to have a baby.

I went to the doctor on Friday. It was a pleasant visit. There is nothing as heartwarming and reassuring as hearing that tiny heartbeat coming from your tummy. I always think it sounds like a train. I recorded it on my phone, and listen to it on occasion to remember why I'm doing this. That little choo choo train is why I'm doing this.

The second time around has been a different experience, for sure. With Carly, it was all-consuming. I mean, I was working full time at a desk job, and when things were slow I had nothing to do but dwell, especially after finishing my school work to graduate from BYU (how on earth did I do that?). This time around, I have Carly as a full-time job, and now that the sickness has been giving me a break occasionally, I even find myself forgetting I'm pregnant. Until I bend over to pick something up and my pants cut into my abdomen. With Carly, she was coming into our family and changing everything: how we'd live, how we'd sleep, how I would be spending my entire life. Our family was completely transforming around her. But Deux is coming into this already existing puzzle; he/she is just a missing piece.

Another difference? I'm showing. I started showing at about 10 weeks I think, maybe earlier. With Carly I was barely showing when I found out she was a girl at 19 weeks. I wore my regular pants up through I think 22 weeks. If I had maternity pants that weren't capris, I'd already to tempted to pull them out. This babe is making herself known much faster, but I hear that's normal the second time around. I was nervous about there being two in there, and at the doctor I said "Make sure there is only one heartbeat" and the nurse practitioner relied "Oh, I wouldn't be able to hear if there were two at this point." Thank you, ma'am, that's reassuring.

We find out if we're having a boy or a girl on November 10th. Way later than I wanted. I will be 20 weeks 4 days. I know, poor me. The doctor prefers to wait until 20 weeks to make sure and see everything in working order, so I guess that is good. And that way the sex will be more obvious if we get a peek. And that way Chris can actually go, since I'm waiting all the way until Thursday that week to get it. So while my bubble was totally burst after hoping I'd find out soon, I guess 5 more weeks won't kill anyone. I guess. The good news is we found a single boy name that we both really like. I've liked it but never brought it up because I thought he wouldn't. I texted it to him and he said "I actually really like that! Sounds like an archaeologist." Ha, whatever works right?

I also got my first awkward semi-rude pregnancy comment this week! Carly and I were at the second-hand store and I got her this little wagon for 90 cents (best 90 cents ever) and she was pulling it out the door. She kept looking back at it excitedly, and was walking really slow. But I just let her walk and do her thing. We got out of the way so a guy could pass us. He looked at her and at me and said "Well, if you don't have your hands full yet, you sure will soon." Ummm, thank you? That's very helpful.

Another exciting difference between this time and last (woah, I'm bouncing all over the place, sorry) is I've already felt movements. Carly I didn't feel until kind of late because a) I didn't know what I was looking for, and b) I had an anterior placenta. So this time it was fun to feel Deux just before 14 weeks. That is by far the most rewarding part of pregnancy, and feeling him/her earlier has been a nice tender mercy.

I've thought a lot about Carly as a big sister. The day we got the positive pregnancy test, I came out of the bathroom and looked at Carly and it was like all the sudden she was new in my eyes. She was a big sister, and her potential to influence her little sibling(s) for good is infinite. She is made of gold. She has an incredible soul and loving spirit and is just inherently helpful and caring. She is also fun and spunky. The very best components to make a big sister. Its like all the sudden my love for her has grown even more, not just because of what she is, but because of what she has to potential to become.

Cheers to a third of the way.

dibs.

2011-09-29T14:41:00.000-07:00

When I was in high school, I used to go grocery shopping with my mom. We'd stop by the freezer section at the beginning, grab a box of Dibs, and snack on them as we shopped. Ever had Dibs? They are little bites of ice cream covered in a shell of chocolate. Highly recommend them. So, here are a few bites of our lives, covered in chocolate (along with a few fab phone pix):

Carly had a small case of the croup. Or as Chris called it "the whoop". One night I came downstairs and he was googling info and he said "an estimated 300,000 deaths!" and I thought From the croup? and I went and looked and he had totally googled "Whooping cough". Oh, dear, I love him. Anyway. Sunday night she was all wheezy and doing that fabulous barking cough. She was making us mighty nervous, and I was about 30 seconds from heading to the ER, but instead we went for a misty night drive, gave her a steamy bath, and put her down with a humidifier. By Tuesday she was almost as good as new. Carly is just about the healthiest child in the world, and I'm grateful for that. Even when she is sick, its short lived. The only thing that makes me nervous is she is so stubborn and strong. She was wheezing so bad and we'd ask her how she was feeling and she'd say "no, I'm ok". Someday she is going to break an arm and I'll have no idea. She got a double bee sting a few weeks ago and barely cried and as I held ice on it she kept saying "I'm ok, mama." A week earlier Chris got stung and I didn't hear the end of it (ha! jokes, jokes).

[down with the whoop . . . I mean, the croup.]

We've been experiencing endless rain and a lot of exhaustion (ok, that's just me) so we've found a few indoor activities. Carly keeps asking to go swimming, so one day I put her swimsuit on and put her in the tub. Bam! Swimming! It has since become a favorite past time and I have one been required to join her in my swimsuit once. We also finally set up a plaything with a slide on it that Chris's parents got her for her birthday. We set it up in the kitchen with the intention of moving it outside, but it won't stop raining. And I actually like it in the kitchen because she plays on it while I do dishes instead of emptying the dishwasher as I load it.

[making mommy's bed. i knew she'd become useful eventually.]

She is talking in longer sentences and the other day used a very complex sentence where she got both of the prepositions right. I was impressed. And the questions are getting worse. If she fixates on something, she won't let it go. On an episode of the Bubble Guppies, there is this giant robot bunny. She has asked by 5 million times "Where big robot bunny go?". I've told her all sorts of places, and once said "the mountains". "The mountains?" she asked. Then stopped to ponder that. Maybe he really did go to the mountains. She also understands so much. On another episode (yes, we're still watching a lot of tv around these parts, but at least it leads to learning opportunities, right?) there is a giant squid that eats a turkey sandwich. We were sitting at dinner and Carly asked "Where giant squid go?". I said "He had to go eat dinner too, just like us." And she replied "Squid go eat a turkey sandwich!". I told you. Brilliant.

[blowing bubbles. good grief, look at those curls.]

As for me, I'm going to the doctor tomorrow and I'm excited. I'm pretty sure pregnancy is the only time anyone is excited about the doctor. I should be finding out when our ultrasound will be. That will be fun. I started out this week pretty sick, and the last 2 days have felt decent. I've even been somewhat productive, doing the dishes and laundry and what not. I still don't like cooking. Food, in general, is gross. But I did hang some things up in our kitchen that have been sitting on the table forever and it feels a little more homey. My parents got me this cute Michigan State whiteboard when they came. I hung it next to the fridge and every day have been doing "This day in history". I'm a massive history nerd, so its fun for me, and I try to pick one out from the History Channel website that might appeal to Chris too. I think it will be fun for our kids someday, and if its not, too bad. They have a nerdy mom.

[new kitchen decor.]

Chris is as good as they come. September 17 marked the 6th anniversary of our first date. I can't believe how much can change in 6 years. But I still think he is the cutest boy I've ever seen. We have both aged. Chris has these crows feet next to his eyes. They make him look older and I like it. The boy is aging well. But when he smiles his eyes scrunch up. That's where the crows feet are from. So they are really more like smile lines. I'm glad he has them. He has been getting the shaft lately. I've entered the phase where I'm still sick but also really hormonal and have a tendency to cry or get irritated. And I have a space bubble that I don't like anyone encroaching. Its not easy to be married to me right now. And Carly is in a "mommy phase", I think just because we spend an outrageous amount of time one-on-one. My poor husband. I don't know how he puts up with us girls. I can't believe he wants another one.

[she pulls out this adorable little move when she is pondering upon an answer to your question.]

When Carly naps, I try to, too. I've been finding I have a hard time actually sleeping, but it is important for me to lie down and rest. I have the Mormon Channel app on my phone, and I've recently been listening to General Conference talks while I rest. I always end up crying, because even though I pick random talks from random years, its always something I need to hear. The other day I was listening to President Uchtdorf give a talk from October 2010 called Of Things That Matter Most. It was a talk about simplifying. He talked about trees, and when times are good, trees grow faster (I'm paraphrasing, obviously). But in difficult times, they slow down and hold steady. He talked about how we need to simplify our lives and when we go through hard times, we need to slow down and hold steady and just focus on what is most important. I've had a lot of mommy guilt since I've been sick. This summer I had a grand plan for things I wanted to do with Carly this fall, and every single one has fallen by the wayside. But President Uchtdorf reminded me that when things are hard, you don't have to do it all. You just have to do whats most important. Carly is fed (except those few times I forgot to give her breakfast), and safe (except that one time I lost her in Target), and loved. Oh, boy, is she loved. And she knows it. So I'm doing ok. For right now, I'm doing ok.

So can you tell I'm excited for Conference? When I was younger, I used to watch Conference with the expectation of some major life-altering announcement. But I've learned that much of Conference is things we've already heard or know. It all just comes out in new ways, so it can be replanted in our hearts, and so it can impact us in the way we need it to for each phase of our lives. What a blessing.

That's all I got.
Might have to send Chris out for some Dibs tonight.

xoxo.

one fine day.

2011-09-26T10:15:00.000-07:00

Fall is in full swing here in the mitten.

We have sunny, crisp days and downright chilly nights.

It sure is nice to crack open the windows and enjoy the fresh breeze.

Michigan does fall very well, and as such, I have made it a goal to get a lot of Fall-ing in every year.

So on Saturday, we were off to pick apples.

We had a fabulous time.

Highlights included

-the choo choo: Carly loved the ride and afterwards kept asking "Where my choo choo go?"

-hotdogs: It may not seem like a highlight, but when Deux saw one of those he/she had to have one. It was pretty much the best hotdog ever.

-apple cider slushy: Carly and Deux were both huge fans, and I'm not usually a cider person.

-Oh, and picking apples, of course. Though Chris and I did the picking and Carly did the eating.

(I didn't bring my big camera because I didn't want to carry it around, and I totally regretted it. It was beautiful!)

[Carly and daddy on the choo choo.]

[showing off our apples/eating our apples.]

[Carly fell and instead of getting up decided to go ahead and eat her apple.]

[beautiful day.]

[Carly and Deux fighting over the cider slushie.]

[our apple eater.]

We now have way more apples than we know what to do with.

Luckily I've been on an apple kick, and Carly and Daddy have an "apple peanut budder" tradition every night.

I also see caramel apples in our near future (Conference is this weekend, after all), and I might even attempt apple pie filling (with store-bough crust . . . I don't mess with wheat).

That afternoon we came home and all three (or four?) of us napped.

Then we went out to Steak n Shake for dinner.

Yes, for reals.

We were living the high life.

And did you know if you spend $8 on a Saturday or Sunday you get a kids meal free?

Talk about a cheap dinner.

Which is good, because the Country Mill hotdogs were less-than-cheap.

The best part of the day?

Spending the whole day together.

No homework.

No meetings.

No chores (even though there should have been).

There wasn't even any puking.

It was one fine day.

a code yellow.

2011-09-22T12:12:00.000-07:00

I had a mommy rite of passage experience this morning. We went to Target because Carly is seriously lacking in warm clothes that fit appropriately (the high-water look only goes to far). I was perusing, and often Carly shares in the shopping. I looked up . . . and she was gone. I searched the toddler clothes section. I searched the shoes, and the boys clothes, and the girls clothes. I called her name louder and louder. Usually if I "lose" her, I find her in about 5 seconds. She doesn't wander far. We are pushing probably 2 minutes at this point and I start to panic.

Much like the time Carly's face had a run-in with a jar of alfredo, my brain went into rational thinking mode. I can keep looking for her, and who knows how long it will take me or how I might miss her by just a section or so (the girl responds to my calling about 50% of the time, especially in a store). And while I was searching it would give her a chance to get farther and farther away, hurt herself, or, heaven forbid, give someone the chance to leave with her. So, instead I found an employee. Its not easy to say "I was so caught up looking at toddler jeans that I misplaced the toddler who would be wearing them" but I did (though it came out more like "I can't find my little girl!") and it was immediately apparent they are trained for this sort of thing. They called a "code yellow" and blocked the exits and sent out her description and about 45 seconds later, they found her. And I wanted to cry. I couldn't decided whether she should be in trouble or not, but I just gave her a big hug instead.

I didn't know where my daughter was for about 3 minutes and I never never want to feel that again. I will never again judge someone with their kid on a monkey backpack leash. In fact, I wonder how much those things go for.

Oh, and where was she, you ask?

Trying on sunglasses.

Yes, she had about 10 pairs on the ground and one on her face.

Can you say diva?

But don't worry.

We got her some very cute jeans.

hum your favorite hymn.

2011-09-21T11:26:00.000-07:00

I was hunched over the toilet this morning, sitting on Carly's bathroom stool (why have I never done that before? way better than kneeling on the floor). Out of the blue, the words to a hymn popped into my head:

There is a green hill far away,
Without a city wall,
Where the dear Lord was crucified,
Who died to save us all.

We may not know, we cannot tell,
What pains he had to bear,
But we believe it was for us
He hung and suffered there.

There was no other good enough
To pay the price of sin.
He only could unlock the gate
Of heav’n and let us in.

Oh, dearly, dearly has he loved!
And we must love him too,
And trust in his redeeming blood,
And try his works to do.

I have no idea how or why or what that song has to do with puking.
But instead of feeling hopelessness, I felt hope.
And instead of crying, I laughed.

And I knew we'd be ok, even if we watched 3 movies in a row this morning.
And I knew that Deux is someone special.

xoxo.

carly at two.

2011-09-19T12:14:00.000-07:00

Our sweet Carly turned two over a month ago. Her birthday was a particularly hard day for me. Chris's parents had come to town the weekend before. I was in bad shape, right when I was first trying out Zofran. Chris had a busy week ahead of him as the summer term was coming to a close. His parents offered to take her home with them for 4 or 5 days. I didn't want to, because I'd miss her birthday. But I was in bad shape, and it would be so good for her. So she went. Spending the anniversary of your child's birth without said child, feeling like you can't take care of her, is not highly recommended. Fortunately, a) she had a wonderful time and was spoiled with fun and attention, b) I kept reminding myself we are getting a second wild bundle of craziness out of this deal . . . and I got to sleep A LOT, and c) we got to celebrate her birthday the day after she came home. It turned out being a winning situation for everyone involved, but it was hard.

I've been getting comments lately on how much Carly has grown. I was out of the social scene for a while, so know that I'm crawling back in, people say she looks like a little girl now, and not so much a baby or toddler. Its true. She is so much little girl, and so little baby. She remains in her crib and in diapers, because I just couldn't deal with it these last few months. But my goal is to get her out of both before the baby comes. Ha! I know, right? Ok, at least out of the crib. I just love her in the crib. We all sleep so much better. Maybe we'll just buy a second one and keep them both in there until we move (when they are 2 and almost 5, good plan).

But I've been keeping a list of wonderful things I want to remember. Perfect Carly in all her two-ness:

Her beary best friend is a red teddy bear by the name of Red Baron (aka "red bear-nun" or "Carly's bear!"), which was given to her by Chris's grandma, Baga. She loves all her stuffed friends, but Red Baron is the king of the crop. He has been on airplanes, the Atlantic Ocean and Pacific, to the ER, on endless walks to numerous parks, and is by her side at every naptime. Red Baron is one of those things we'll keep forever, and when I think I've misplaced him at a store, I literally panic. He's a good bear.

She has recently started to "say prayers", where we tell her what to say and she repeats. She usually only repeats the last word of each phrase, and if we give her a phrase that's too long, she says "Yeah". So her prayers go: "Father . . . mommy . . . daddy . . . Jesus . . . yeah . . . AMEN!". There is nothing as heartwarming as watching your daughter offer up her very first prayers.

The rest appear to be funny things she says. Its funny how when they are younger you focus so much on what they do, but now her little personality is completely revealed in what she says.

When she wants to bring something somewhere (usually a stuffed animal), she looks up at you with those pretty blue eyes and sweetly asks "Red Bear-nun comin' wit us?". "Daddy comin' wit us?". And if she thinks she is going to be left behind, "Carly comin' wit us?".

She is very curious and we have begun the phase where I am asked "What are you doing?" or "What's that?" every 15 seconds. What are you doing? Washing my hands. What are you doing? Drying my hands off. What are you doing? Closing the door. I try to be patient and answer every single time. Its not easy. But she is so sweet because she also often asks, "Are you ok, mama?".

She also narrates her actions: "I'm running!" We'll ask her to come eat dinner and she says "No! I'm jumping!" Priorities. She also announces her presence with all sorts of gusto: "I'm here!!!" and "Look at me!!". These get lots of laughs at the grocery store.

[helping with pumpkin cupcakes. yes we bake on the floor.]

She has recently started calling me Erin. The other day she got up from her nap and started calling "Erin! Erin!" I went in and told her, You call me mommy. The smart alec replied "Whats your name?". I laughed and said, Well, my name is Erin, but you call me mommy because I'm your mommy. It was pretty funny, but the girl has got some spice. Not sure where she got that.

As she has been from the day she was born, she remains a lousy, picky eater. We are already to the point where we have stand-offs at the table insisting she have "3 more bites". It usually turns into "just 1 more bite." Without fail, she'll eat pancakes, fruit, tomatoes, and guzzle gallons of milk. I swear we go through milk like a teenage boy lives here.

She is still a great sleeper. She went through a phase where she was waking up before 7 and I just can't do that. And that's really not enough sleep for her. So Chris went in a few mornings in a row and told her "Its still night-night time". She went back to sleep almost every time, and now she is back to sleeping in past 8. She's always been a champ sleeper, and I'm hoping for another one just like her.

Last but not least, few fabulous one-liners:

"Cute bag, mama."

I put one of her tank tops on her monkey, named Green Ah Eee (she named that one), and it came down past the monkey's legs down to his feet. She was very excited and said "Green Ah Eee's a princess!".

She has two stuffed lions. One is big and she says he says "roar". The other one is David and is smaller. I said "David says roar too" and she said No. I said Well what does David say? She replied "mmmeeeeeoooowwww!". Poor David.

We came home from the store and Red Baron was on the living room floor. She ran to him and said "Red Bear-nun! Its so good to see you!"

I was sitting in the arm of the couch and she said "What you doing up there, mom?".

[chocolate chip sneaker.]

She just does so much and says so much and learns so much.

I can't believe what a little girl she really is.

But she is so so so much fun.

man, i feel like a woman.

2011-09-17T19:35:00.000-07:00

There is some good news coming from the C House.

From about 11 am to about 5 pm, I feel . . . alive.

As long as I nap during Carly's nap from 1-3.

I mean, this week I waxed my eyebrows for the first time in about 5 weeks.

My face looks brand new.

And I painted my toenails for the first time in two months.

And Carly's too.

And I took Carly to preschool skating with a friend.

She lasted a whole 45 seconds on the skates, and I snacked on a GF bagel the whole time, but she had fun running around the rink in the strobe lights, staring at the giant kangaroo doing the hokey pokey, and playing with hula hoops.

We'll have to go again.

And I went shopping with another friend.

I saw this little lovely and it came home with me.

Skip Hop diaper bags are way nice and cute, but way expensive.

But at TJMaxx it was perfect early-birthday-present price.

I'm sure Deux is thrilled.

And thanks to my new flavor fav Pinterest, we're trying new things.

I made these today for our ward picnic.

Seriously yum and seriously easy.

And Carly had "lights" in her bath tonight.

It was a hit.

So while I don't expect to feel well anytime soon (according to the Carly-pregnancy timeline I've got a good 7 weeks of sickness left), at least we're no longer on the couch all day, every day . . . just most of the day, most days. Ha!

Hope you're well.

xoxo.

(Oh, and sorry for a post of blurry pictures. Cameras don't work well in the dark, it turns out.)

the handygirl, the artist, the princess.

2011-09-14T18:13:00.000-07:00

Carly has been expanding her horizons a bit the past . . . while.

I'm losing track of time.

But this past weekend, Chris finally put the license plate frame I got a while ago on my car.

And he wasn't short any help.

We replaced the Chicago Cubs frame, that broke quite a while ago and just read "Chicago".
I'm loving my new MSU Hockey frame.
Doesn't it look pretty?

Oh, but Carly.
Yes, she liked helping daddy quite a bit and carried the wrench around saying "Carly's wrench".
And she did it all in a dress.

My friend recently started doing a simple craft every morning with her little boy.

I thought that was a brilliant idea, and wanted to do something similar.

I'm not quite at a feeling-good-enough place to tackle anything major or do it every morning, this morning we sat on the kitchen floor and painted with water colors.

The girl loved it.

She was kind of driving me bonkers because she would put the brush in the color and then the water, so we painted mostly with water, but it was good for her to learn and experience something new. And she asked several times throughout the day to do it again, so this craft thing just might be a keeper.

I took an idea from Pinterest, but found two problems.

1) It is really hard to make a C out of tape.

2) When I peeled the take off it totally tore the paper. I was annoyed.

We're still calling it a success, though we both had paint all over our hands, and one of us had it on our nose.

Carly was very concerned about her dirty hands.

For how wild she is, she sure can be a princess.

Speaking of princesses . . . .

Oh, I introduced this girl to Tangled and she is a fan. And we happened to have a box of dress-up princess clothes that Chris's aunt gave her in July as an early birthday present. The first thing she asks for when she wakes is the princess dress. And its often a fight to get her to take it off when we go somewhere. She also likes her crown and her wand and necklaces and these little pink shoes that came with it all. And the best part? There are two crowns. So I get one too.

Last but not least: where has sidewalk chalk been all my life?

Why have I not been utilizing this tool all summer?

I just bought some yesterday and it has provided endless entertainment that requires me to exert very little energy. We are fans. Even though when I draw a kitty she calls it a pumpkin and when I draw a dog she calls it a "moo". And she just gallops through the hopscotch instead of actually hopping.

We're working on it.

xoxo.

the bitter and the sweet.

2011-09-09T15:04:00.000-07:00

Oh, peeps. I've been holding so much in. It sure is hard to blog when you have one single thing occupying your mind and that one single thing is also a secret. Its also hard to blog when all you want to do is puke and sleep. But it sounds like my lack of blogging hinted at my big "secret" anyway. Looks like I blog too much.

I had a plan. As a second pregnancy, this one was going to be easier. My body had done this before, so it can't be as shocked as when I had Carly (which, for those of you who recall, was no walk in the park). And then I got called to seminary and, forgive my faith, but I thought if seminary and baby were meant to coincide, then I would be blessed with an easier pregnancy. But, as we all know, things don't go according to plan. We found out about Deux in mid July. One week later the nausea kicked in, and one week after that I was down for the count. I've never felt like this. One day I had a dear friend take Carly for like 6 hours and when Chris came home he found a shaky, dehydrated mess. I went on Zofran, and the side effects were so bad. I was shaky and dizzy and needed to puke but physically could not. I would just take the pill and go to bed for hours. Thank heaven this came at a time when Chris was able to help and his parents were coming to town. After a few days and lots of pain, I knew Zofran was not going to be the best friend I was hoping for. I talked to the doctor and he gave me another anti-nausea med. After a few days on this, I was able to function, eat, get up. It wasn't the miracle solution I was looking for, but it made it so I could exist. So there you go. I've been anti-social. I wear make-up about once a week and can't remember the last time I used my straightener. My parents came and I was good-to-go only about half the time, which was really hard for me, but good for Carly because she got lots of playing time. I've kept it classy, puking at Sam's Club (where I'm pretty sure I scared a teenage girl into practicing abstinence), and behind our parking garage while Carly ran up and down the hill. Oh, and the spit. Like last time, I make a ton of spit and have to spit it in a cup or on the ground. Its nasty, and I would give anything for the spit to stop. Anything. Unfortunately, my daughter is a little sponge these days and has started making spitting noises and saying "I'm spitting!".

Like I said, classy.

I know I don't have the worst pregnancies ever. And like I said with Carly, I'm grateful I get to have pregnancies at all. But it sure would have been nice for it to be a little easier this time. Or at least not harder. Just for the record.

My hero in all of this has been my husband. Let me tell you, I won the lottery with this one. He has had to work double time, dealing with school and all that stress and busyness, taking care of me, being pretty much mom and dad to Carly. He comes home when he can't afford to. He runs around with Carly when he has no energy. He cooks and cleans after a full day of teaching and studying and working and meeting. He has done so much and we would literally be nowhere without him. I love him. I can't say that enough.

And the big sis? This is the hardest part for me. I literally have tears in my eyes just thinking about what I want to write and share and remember. I hate hate hate not being able to take care of Carly like she should be taken care of. I hate that she watches so much tv. I hate that I can't take her outside very long. I hate that I can't teach her or play with her the way I want. I worry about her and pray for her so hard that she isn't hurting or wondering whats wrong with me or whats wrong with her. It breaks my heart. And when it comes to being sick, I can handle it (for the most part) on my behalf. I just need it to end for her. There is a good chance she is oblivious to the situation and just thinks mommy is lazy. That's fine. As long as she is ok.

In case you're wondering about Seminary, I went to our Bishop and told him the situation. He found a sub for my first two weeks so I don't start until October. I still don't know how I'm going to do it, but we'll cross that bridge when we get there. Fingers crossed for . . . . something. Something to work out.

Chris gave me a blessing near the beginning of this little adventure and in it the Lord reminded me you cannot taste the sweet without first partaking of the bitter. Those words echo through my mind on a regular basis. And right now I think I'm so consumed with surviving the bitter, I don't stop enough to think about this sweet thing joining our family.

So as for the fun stuff?

Right now my due date is March 25th. This will put our kids (eek! . . . kids) two years and seven months apart. It will also mean the bulk of my pregnancy will take place over the winter, which I'm already happy about after having Carly in August (even though I'm going to need a lot of new maternity clothes. nice.). This also happens to be my oldest brother's birthday, as well as the weekend The Hunger Games movie comes out. So really, I'm ok if this baby is a few days late so I can see it before I'm down for the count (is that the second time I've used "down for the count" in this post?).

We will find out if Deux is a he or a she, and that will probably take place the first week or two of November. We both want another girl, though Chris is dead-set on it and I'm more open to the possibility of a boy. Chris will hardly even discuss boy names! Needless to say, he loves his daddy's girl. But of course we'd still love a boy. Or at least try really hard to :).

As for names, like last time we probably won't share until the baby comes (unless you're a lucky immediate family member! woohoo!). I'd say we're already down to 2 girls names, because they are both names we loved for Carly and that hasn't changed in two years. A boy will probably remain nameless for days, as our boy name tastes are drastically different. He likes pretty traditional boy names, and while I don't like crazy names, I like something a little more modern. I love the last name as a first name thing. I tried to get him to like "Mauer" (rhymes with 'power') which is the last name of a super awesome baseball player. But he wouldn't go for it. Which is why I'm sharing it. ha!

Ok, there's my novel. We are excited and feel blessed, while still praying for a little relief. That's ok, right?

Yay for babies.
xoxo.

here we go around again.

2011-09-08T16:39:00.000-07:00

{oh, dear. someone come clean my mirrors}

welcome fabulous fall.

2011-09-06T08:57:00.000-07:00

We spent the morning on a long walk through the trees

running down the hill at the park

pushing bear and towel in the big stroller

jumping off stumps

and mastering the art of blowing bubbles.

All in sweatshirts and new fall shoes.

See, I told you fall would be fab.

xoxo.

do something nice for yourself.

2011-09-01T16:06:00.000-07:00

Our Thursdays this Fall look like they are going to be long days.

The health app on my phone suggested I "do something nice for yourself" today.

Well, don't mind if I do.

I've been admiring this bag at Target for a while now, and since its finally on super clearance, I did something nice for myself and brought it home. I thought I'd need something new and simple for Fall, and I happened to have a cute pin that matched it perfectly.

And as a certified toddler-chaser, I've learned the messenger style is a must.

Happy Labor Day Weekend.

Do something nice for yourself.

summer close-out.

2011-08-31T11:33:00.000-07:00

For some reason, I'm extremely anxious for summer to end and fall to begin this year.

I'm the kind of person who looks forward to a season, and then is ready for it to be over when it has run its course. Thank goodness we now live in a place with all 4 seasons done appropriately.

But honestly, I'd live in a place where is was always fall, if I could.

But, I'm trying to enjoy the moment and still get some life out of summer.

This weekend Chris suggested we go swimming.

It will probably be our last swim outing, as I think our pool closes on Labor Day, and the temperature is kind of cooling off around here (I heart chilly nights). I'm glad we went one more time because it had been a while and Carly sure loves it.

It was slightly breezy and Carly was shivering her little blue lips off but she didn't want to get out. Towel had fun, too, as Carly and Daddy had fun throwing it/him/her across the pool. "Towel flying!".

Other than that we're continuing our daily jaunts to one park or another. Some members of our ward have a park-like backyard that they open to the moms of the ward on weekdays, so Carly and I head over there. It is not busy like a public park and a lot cleaner and more shaded. I love it.

They have a little climbing wall and Carly can scale the whole thing by herself.

In a dress.

It is pretty impressive.

Though one time her foot slipped and she caught herself.

She declared "I almost fall!".

It was pretty cute.

I know there are probably a few more weeks of summer ahead, but I'm welcoming September with open and excited arms (in fact, can we skip to October?).

Thanks, Summer 2011.

It's been real.

mimi and papak came to play.

2011-08-25T19:19:00.000-07:00

This week we marked one year in Michigan by hosting our very first T family visitors.

My mom and dad came to visit, and we sure liked having them here.

They did our laundry and cooked food and did dishes.

They got up with Carly at 6 am (!) when she decided to wake up that early.

They played with her until everyone was played out (not really . . . there's no such thing).

I was lousy at taking pictures, but I did snap a few when we showed them campus.

[Carly and Sparty . . . we'll have to take a pic like this every fall and watch her grow]

[my parents are cool.]

The highlight of our campus visit was probably feeding the ducks (though my mom did get a tres cute MSU shirt for only $5!). Carly loved watching them go crazy over the crackers. And after we fed them, of course they started following us as we walked away; Carly was hoping they'd come with us and said "Come on, quacks!".

Next time they come, we'll show them more.

We'll show them a Great Lake or two, visit Detroit, and maybe even Chicago.

There is so much about our beautiful home that we have yet to explore.

But this time was about playing.

Doing puzzles.

Cooking in Carly's kitchen.

Going on walks to the park.

Jumping.

Running.

Eating Mexican.

And Chinese.

And American.

And Mexican again.

And just looking at each other.

Thanks for coming, Mimi and Papak.

xoxo.

two for the show.

2011-08-16T13:15:00.000-07:00

We celebrated Carly's birthday on Saturday with a little party of 3.

It had been a crazy week, and we took the opportunity to soak of the day as a family.

For dinner we had Carly's favorite, sloppy joes and green beans.

Carly wore her "2" shirt, which I whipped up the day before (I'm currently living life a few days behind).

We had cupcakes, which may or may not have been Little Debbie since 1) Chris is on some "eating healthy" binge, 2) I can't eat wheat, and 3) Carly isn't a real cake girl. But they looked cute anyway.

We lit candles and sang the song and Carly was an expert at spitting on/blowing out the candles.

And she looked pretty darn cute doing it.

After we forced a few bites of cupcake in her, we offered a popsicle, and she was all over that.

So instead of messy cake pictures this year, we get messy popsicle pictures.

I'll take it.

In fact, I had a Firecracker of my own.

Yums.

And we opened presents.

Carly was very good at this.

She kept pointing at the presents on the table and saying "Presents now, pease?".

She was spoiled with puzzles, books, clothes, a mini pillow pet monkey, and a Little People school bus from her mom and dad. We are pretty proud of our selection because she loves it, but didn't realize it played music. Oh, boy, does it play music.

But perhaps the biggest news from the day was our pre-party activity.

We went to our local store and got Carly a fishy for her birthday.

We debated between a basic 19 cent goldfish and a little more expensive one.

We finally decided on a betta, hoping it will live longer and won't be too hard to care for.

And its pretty too.

We picked him out, and Carly wanted to hug him.

We had to teach her that you just wave at him,

you don't try to get him out of his house because he likes to swim.

So far so good.

Introducing . . . . Harpo.

It took all of 15 seconds for me to get really attached to him, and 20 seconds to decide we're never getting a dog, because all the responsibility falls to the mom. But I'm glad we have him. Chris says I talk to Harpo more than I talk to him (ha!).

And want to know where we got his name? Well, of course we were initially inclined to name him Nemo, but he didn't look like a Nemo. So Chris quoted Dory out of the blue (ha!) and said "Not much fun for little Harpo", since Dory always gets Nemo's name wrong. And . . . . we had Harpo. And hearing Carly say "Har-po!" is a definite bonus.

But really, how did we end up with a two-year-old?

We took Carly to her 2 year appointment this morning and she came in at 27 lbs 8 oz and 36 inches tall.

She has gained exactly 20 lbs in her two years, and grown 17 inches.

Its bittersweet to see the strong, smart, fun girl she has become.

Here's to the best two years

(so far, anyway).

on a boat.

2011-08-11T18:09:00.000-07:00

Our fantastic friends invited us to go boating in July.

I just got some pictures from her, so I thought I'd share.

We had such a fun time.

I mean, I get really easily freaked out by even tubing, and spend a great deal of the time screaming.

But its fun screaming.

Mostly.

All the pictures of me and Chris on the tube look like I'm being tortured.

Its safe to say, I wasn't.

Mostly.

[Chris the skier.]

[this is really the happiest face I have in all the pictures. I promise it was fun.]

[our super-cute hosts.]

Carly even got a ride on the tube.

She did great, until she started to fall asleep at the end.

Guess the subtle jostling and wind in her face was akin to a lullaby.

But she did LOVE "swinning" in the lake, and would announce:

"Carly swinning! Carly swinning!".

[me and S on our "girls ride". much slower. and S even screams louder than me.]

Chris and I came home totally toasted.

I guess you're supposed to reapply sunscreen on yourself too,

and not just your baby.

Oh well.

We sure had fun.

Yay for summer.

two years ago.

2011-08-10T06:13:00.000-07:00

Two years ago, Miss Carly joined the world.

It has truly been the best two years.

Its not even funny how much we love her.

Happy Birthday, Car.

xoxo.

just another day in paradise.

2011-07-31T18:54:00.000-07:00

We're on autopilot in the C House.

Carly and I spend our summer days at the park, on walks, at the pool, running errands, playing with friends (both real and of the stuffed variety), drawing, and going on wagon rides.

Chris spends his summer days teaching undergrads.

We live for evenings and weekends spent together.

[How cute is she? Outfit courtesy of Chris's sweet cousin, who happens to work at the Gap. Red lunch box courtesy of Goodwill and a really deep disinfecting clean by mommy. Carly loves her "new box", as she calls it. Best 79 cent purchase ever.]

[Carly and daddy hiding from mommy. My job is to say "Carly? Carly? Where are you?!"]

[Carly and her posse.]

[Just because she's pretty.]

[The diva picked out her whole outfit on this day, including "pink shoes!" and pink bow.]

["swinning" with towel.]

That's all I've got for you.

I just wanted the record to show:

Life is good.

because i love food.

2011-07-23T20:03:00.000-07:00

I made homemade potato salad tonight.

I'm mean . . . there was no potato salad, and then I cooked potatoes and boiled eggs and chopped pickles and mixed mayo and mustard . . . and then there was potato salad. Is it lame that I'm proud of that? I love potato salad. It is yummy. And while mine was nowhere near as fab as my dad's, it was only the first batch of many.

You see, I don't cook.

I know lots of people say that but really they can, but I really just am not that good at it.

For the first 4 years of our marriage, Chris cooked probably 80% of the time. Chris is a good cook. It is relaxing to him. He enjoys it. I do not. And if we wanted food that tasted good, Chris had to cook it. We were both going to school and/or working, so we came home together and I would do something productive (or watch tv . . . ) while he made us dinner. And when I was pregnant, we would come home, I would sleep while he cooked, he would wake me up to eat, I would go back to sleep, and he would wake me up to go to bed. Oh, those were some good times. But even after I had Carly and I stayed home and Chris was gone all day, he would still come home from school in Tennessee and make me dinner. It was a good set-up for me.

Then we moved to Michigan.

The thing about his current program? Its way hard.

It takes so much time, so much energy.

Upon moving here and starting that program, one thing became very clear to me:

I would be in charge of the food.

So over the past almost-year, I've been working on expanding my horizons. I started off with the basics, and now can make most of our "typical" meals without even burning anything. So I've gradually been trying to add new things. Like I learned to make beef and broccoli. And I learned to make tilapia. And my mom's mowed grass. And . . . ok, I'm sure there is more.

But the point is, I'm trying.

And I'm getting better.

And I made potato salad with only two texts to my mom and one phone call with my dad.

Things brings me to someone who can cook.

And I mean really cook.

My brother married a girl from Texas, and she can cook.

She has a cooking/baking/entertaining blog called

The Apron Gal.

She is cute, her blog is cute.

But the best part is that it is realistic.

No crazy long or complicated recipes.

I mean, I can use these recipes, that shows you how possible they are.

She also just happened to go to Europe for 5 weeks (I'm not jealous . . . I'm not jealous . . . ) so I'm looking forward to some great recipes from Italy (ok, probably not wheaty Italy, but you can!), Spain, and France.

So if you're looking for something new to make for dinner, or dessert, or lunch, or a snack, or a party, check her out.

Oh, and enter to win a super cute apron here.

She is The Apron Gal, after all.

Oh, and because I had to share . . .

We went to the local Farmers Market today and one of the booths was a gluten free bakery. The lady has Celiac, as does her mother and daughter. They all have red hair, so she said her husband jokes that all Celiacs are redheads (ha!). Anywho . . . she had a plethora of yummy looking GF goodies. I left with the blueberry muffins, but I'll be back for the cinnamon rolls. And the pita bread. And the apple pie muffins. And a loaf of bread. Or two.

[isn't she lovely?]

Ok, now I'm hungry.

Potato salad, anyone?

xoxo.

a day in the life of a princess.

2011-07-20T19:47:00.000-07:00

Driving.

Sprinting.

Giggling.

Exploring.

Emptying the linen closet of dishtowels and snuggling with all of them.

All while wearing a tutu.

smells fishy.

2011-07-19T19:27:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was probably one of the hardest days of my motherhood to date.

We're talking public screaming, multiple time outs, lots of crying on both our parts, and getting hit in the face . . . on purpose. I was wondering where in the world my sweet Carly went.

Well, I saw her today.

We went to the Library story time and she was so cute.

She wanted to participate but she is hesitant around other young kids.

It was fun to watch her gradually become more comfortable with herself and the situation. She danced with the other kids and did "itty bitty spider", and even crawled over and sat on the rug with the other kids . . . for about 10 seconds and then came back to me. But I love watching her expand her horizons and experience new things and learn to be more sure of herself.

She is such a kid.

A day like today is what a mom needs after a day like yesterday.

Because if we had had another day like yesterday, Carly would be on sale on Craigslist.

Anywho.

Tonight we sent Carly up to our friends' house and went and saw HP 7.2. I knew this movie would be a lot of the Battle of Hogwarts, so I didn't expect to like it as much as the previous couple. And I didn't. But it was still really really good and it was fun to go to a movie with the hubs.

Then we came home and I hadn't had real food all day and I was starving so I decided to whip up one of my new favorite meals. In fact I like this new meal so much, I thought I'd share (I hope you didn't just faint in shock that I actually cooked food . . . and that I'm sharing a recipe. I know, this is big).

You see, I really like fish. But I never eat it for two reasons: 1) Chris HATES fish. I mean hates it. On his mission he told people he was allergic to it so he wouldn't have to choke it down. Because he probably would have thrown up if he tried. 2) I just don't know how to make it.

My friend gave me this recipe, and now I feel like I can make fish!

Tonight was my second go-around, and now I'm officially obsessed with tilapia.

Here we go:

Oh, this recipe makes a lot. Half it for 2-3 people. Quarter if for a single serving (like me).

2 lbs tilapia

1/2 c Parmesan

1/4 c softened butter (not melted)

3 tbsp mayo

2 tbsp lemon juice

1/4 tsp dried basil

1/4 tsp pepper

1/8 tsp onion powder

1/8 tsp seasoning salt

Mix ingredients together (except fish, or course). Line baking sheet with foil. Spray with non-stick spray. Broil about 3 min (according to recipe . . . when I do just one piece 2 min is plenty). Flip and broil 3 min. Top fish with mixture and broil 2 more minutes or until topping is golden brown.

Just watch your fish and make sure not to overcook it. I also realized I do it wrong. I top it when its still raw, flip it and coat the other side too. So I coat it on both sides. Extra butter can't be a bad thing. Do it however you want. Its all good.

Its actually really easy and really quick. I get frozen tilapia and thaw it in luke warm water. It only takes a few minutes to thaw. And I eat mine with Zataran's Yellow Rice, though I bet Rice Pilaf would be good if you're the wheat-eating type.

So go make some fish.

Its good for you.

Especially when coated in butter and mayo.

[meant to take a picture. but its so good, your plate will look like this in no time.]

rolling in the deep.

2011-07-14T18:00:00.000-07:00

Before naptime today, Car and I had a dance party.

The girl loves her some dance party.

Some things that make this video extra fabulous:

a) She finds a dishtowel in my purse that I hid because it needs to get washed (I have to sneak them away and wash them one at a time).

b) She cheers for herself: "Go Carly! Go Carly!".

c) The camera didn't pick it up really well, but she sings the last word of every line of the song: "aaalllll!", "deeeep!", "soouulllll!". She does the same thing in the car.

And this time she got a little carried away.

Reminds me of that one time she ran into the glass door.

Classic.

We recently got Carly a tricycle and a Radio Flyer wagon for super cheap at a ward member's garage sale. Today we took the maiden voyage in the wagon. Carly was a big fan, though she enjoyed pulling her "friends" in it just as much as riding in it herself. We also spent some time on bike-riding lessons. Her legs are still a bit short for the tricycle. She eventually gave up and let Jojo drive:

But I fully intend on letting her pedal around our unfinished basement all day long when the snow returns.

Finally, we scared the crap out of our daughter tonight. In honor of the big Harry Potter release at midnight, we thought we would show her the "Mysterious Ticking" video on YouTube. We thought she might think it was funny or cute. About 5 second in she says "I don't like" in a worried voice. Then she starts saying it over and over "don't like . . . don't like". Then, about 30 second in she screams in terror and starts sobbing hysterically. Poor child. In hindsight, I can totally see why it would be terrifying for her. We had to snuggle and watch Bubble Guppies after that, because she was really freaked out. Parenting fail.

Happy Weekend.

the good, the bad, and the ugly.

2011-07-13T11:40:00.000-07:00

the good.

Carly is so funny.

She says the funniest things.

I'm constantly laughing.

And she is so cute.

Yesterday I came home from the gym, had a quick dinner and then decided to have my new favorite treat: 100 Calorie Skinny Cow Ice Cream Bar. The chocolate chocolate ones. Yummers.

Now Carly is sweet all the time, but if you happen to have ice cream in your hand, she is really sweet. She will come up to you in her cute urgent little way, and burrow herself onto your lap, and in her sweetest and most polite voice say "Pease, mama. Ice cream." And you can't help but share with her.

And it ends up looking like this:

(please remember I literally just got home from the gym)

That girl is just as edible as the ice cream bar.

Less calories, too.

the bad.

I have recently decided that Carly watches WAY too much tv. I won't tell you how much because a) I don't want you to judge me, and b) if your kid watches more than that I don't want you to feel bad. I'm not against tv at all. In fact, Carly watches mostly education shows and she has learned things from them that I would never have thought to teach her (like, what a sloth is, for example). The amount of tv a child watches is a personal decision for parents, but I have felt lately like I lean on it too much. It takes zero energy or effort to prop that girl in front of Diego. I've been doing it too often and for too long. So I end up finding her completely zoned out like this:

So I recently decided to go on a tv "detox" where we just watch a lot less tv. I know I'm right, because sometimes the last few days when I say "Let's play!" Carly responds with "No! Diego!". We will have none of that. I'm still not down to as little tv as I want, but we have been decreasing every day. It requires me to spend less time on the computer, get up and shower before she wakes up, and figure out how to do dishes with her playing with the dishwasher racks, among other things. But it will be worth it. We'll both be happier.

the ugly.

Carly must have heard that she is almost 2, because she sure has spent a lot of time looking like this lately:

That would be her, screaming in her "time-out" corner. Carly actually responds really well to "time-out". But lately they have been a lot more frequent. She is in this screaming phase. She just doesn't listen to anything we say. And she is insistent upon doing everything herself. And when you won't let her do it (like, cutting a spaghetti squash open with a massive knife, for example) she screams and falls to the floor and throws a fit. I'm pretty much terrified to take her in public. We went to Hobby Lobby today and she was so out of control I thought I was never going anywhere ever again. But we had to go to JoAnn's too, and I ended up putting her in timeout in the bathroom (no worries, I didn't make her sit on the floor). Anyway. I know she is two. I know its normal. I know this too shall pass. And I know that Carly actually isn't that bad compared to some much more challenging children. I just thought I'd share my pain.

xoxo.

nobody likes you when you're 23.

2011-07-10T04:50:00.000-07:00

This beauty is 23 months old today.

I used to say Carly did something new and cute every single day.

Now its more like she does something new and cute every 10 minutes.

She loves "Itsy Bitsy Spider", "Rock-a-bye, Baby", "Row, Row, Row Your Boat", and "Head Shoulders Knees and Toes".

She is getting much better with her colors, since she and daddy like to say what color all the cars are when we walk to the park.

She can count to 6 on her own, then it goes something like " eleven . . . two . . . nine . . . twelve."

I don't think she even knows what a letter is. We'll work on that.

She loves swimming. Like really loves it.

She says funny things:

One morning she woke up and the lawn mower was going outside. "Uh, oh! Airplane!" she said.

Another time there was a thunder storm going on and she cried out in the middle of the night "airplane!".

Seems like she associates loud noises and airplanes.

Yesterday she started running around in circles with her arms up yelling "Carly's flying! Carly's flying!".

When we read scriptures at night, she flips through the pages and says "an came pass . . . an came pass" ['and it came to pass']. The first time she said that out of the blue and we were like 'maybe she does listen?!'.

We went boating yesterday and on the tube she kept saying "wee!"; then we would hit a bump and she would say "WOAH!".

She was running in circles and I said "Wow, Carly you are so fast!" and she said back, mid-run, "Thank you, mama!". Then she started chanting "Carly's fast! Carly's fast!".

She poked me with a book and I said "Ow" so she gave me a kiss and I said thank you and she said "you're welcome". This created a new game where she would poke me on purpose, and we would go through the whole process over and over.

She is an excellent talker and constantly has words flowing from her mouth. She can say pretty much anything you say. A few that come out extra cute are "lawn mower", "peanut butter", "Backyardigans", and "delicious".

She has been quick to throw a tantrum lately, and its hard to tell whether she is just recovering from our long weekend, or if she is entering "terrible twos". We were kind of hoping we would skip that phase.

She really loves nursery. We get to church and about 15 minutes into sacrament meeting she asks, "Go play?".

She LOVES Toy Story. She also likes Cars and "Meeno".

She has a bubbly and sweet personality. She likes to say hi to everyone at the store. She is so full of excitement and zest for life. She is a loving caretaker to all her stuffed animals (whom she calls her "friends"), and has begun to show love and interest for human friends her age, too (thankfully; she has always loved playing with adults, and I've worried a bit about her lack of interaction with other young kids. yay for nursery and playgroup!).

She is so good at "prayers", and sometimes if I'm still getting something for dinner but she and Chris have their arms folded, she will say "Please, mama. Prayers." And there is nothing sweeter than seeing that girl kneeling (or squatting) in her pajamas with her arms folded in prayer.

We like our 23-month-old a lot.

these summer nights.

2011-07-08T19:33:00.000-07:00

Nothing better than an ice cream cone with candy eyeballs.
[If you're the two-year-old.]

Nothing better than a hot fudge turtle flurry.
[If you're the mama.]

The banana shake probably would have been better than the mint one.
[If you're the daddy.]

There's always next time.

We love these summer nights.