Duck . . . Duck . . .

Goose!

I'm definately the goose.

And last night I was a goose with really sore feet,

a husband stranded at campus,

and a really cute Gap diaper bag.

Let me explain.

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They have a consignment sale of baby stuff here in Knoxville. Its called "Duck, Duck, Goose". I heard about it from a co-worker and found it online where you could register for the "First Mom's Club", which gave you access to the sale the night before it opened to the general public. Perfect, I figured: A few pregnant ladies, a few moms, and lots of inexpensive "gently used" baby gear. Wrong. So so wrong. First, there were about 500 ladies registered as "first time moms", not including the one guest you could bring. Second, people are dirty liars. Sorry, if you have a 7-year-old child with you, I'm gonna call you out as NOT a first-time mom. It was insane. I got there at about 7 and the line was all the way down the shopping square. That was my first warning to escape. But I convinced myself to get in line. I had a debit card in one pocket, a grocery sack bunched up in the other, and was snacking on a peach yogurt. Ameteur. The ladies around me had laudry baskets, giant buckets on wheels, and duffel bags. That was my second warning to escape. When I finally got in it was mayhem. I surfed through the baby girl section and pulled only items that looked untouched and were pricey brands (hey, I can get normal brands anywhere). After that I decided to look elsewhere. Apparently the whole "bring one guest" thing is a good idea (Chris was in class) because everything was completely picked over. My main goal was to find some sort of rocking chair or glider. (How was I going to get it home in my Honda Civic without a husband with me? Hadn't gotten that far yet). Of all things baby, the rocking chair/glider is the only thing I can't find an inexpensive version of. There were several, one really cute white one, but all the 'purchase tags' were gone. Sad. After an hour of bewildered searching, I decided that was enough and got in line. Where I stayed for over 2 hours. (Poor Chris was stuck on campus until after 10:30, and when he reached the car he found a crying wife.) You know when you stay in a long line and you think "maybe I should just put it all back and leave"? I had that thought about 20 times. But after an hour, and then an hour and a half, it feels like quitting when you're so close to the finish line. So I stuck it out. My feet where killing me and I wanted to cry (I held it in until I reached the car), but I finally escaped into the cool spring air with a sack full of Gap clothes and a very hungry tummy. Whoa.

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And possibly worse than my time in line was the people I stood in front of. They kept pointing to things and saying "Aiden has that, he's so good at matching" and "Jacob has that, he's the best eater" (wait isn't that two kids?) and then would go on and on about how Aiden was born as big as a two-month-old and Jacob had the strongest legs you've ever seen. Gag. If I ever review the week-by-week weight gain of our baby girl in your presence please smack me. And the dad kept singing the line "And a beer" from that hick version of 12 Days of Christmas. Nice.

~

Was it worth it?

No. Not at all.

~

But I did get a few cute items, most of which actually still had the original tags on them.

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My major grab was the Gap diaper bag (actually not so neon pink in real life) with accompanying changing pad. Diaper bags are insanely expensive, so I was considering using a big purse. But this has all the perks of a diaper bag and is really cute and being gently used it came out at $7. Lovely. And yes, that sleeping gown on the right is blue. Its Gap and super adorable and I thought Lil' would look cute in it. Blue = boy is really just a socially defined expectation anyway (there's some sociology for you). There was a yellow one too, and I should have grabbed it because it was gone when I went back. I have some weird obsession with those infant sleeping gowns. I want to buy millions of them. They're my favorite. And those pink Carter hats? 5 for a dollar. And the Gerber kimono tops? 4 for a dollar. Again, lovely. Chris's favorite is the teal Ralph Lauren dress. Its so cute.

And this is my favorite, which is why it gets a close-up. Gap dress with tags still on. Its 3-6 months and it will be the dead of winter at that point, but we'll pair it with some legging and a sweater, right? Adorable. At $9, this was my most expensive purchase. I got the whole lot for much less than this dress would have been at a Gap store.


K, that was a lot of complaining about Duck, Duck, Goose followed by bragging about the awesome deals I got. Strange.
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Now I just need a little girl to spit up all over these cute clothes.